Know Joe Moe

I Saw It Happen Today

2011-12-28T21:18:00.000-08:00

It's a terrible thing when people lose their jobs...

I saw a business close today. The general manager came out of his office toward the end of day and told what staff was lingering that he needed them to work late. They needed to call all of their clients and tell them that they would not be delivering or selling anything the next day. He told the staff that, at the stroke of midnight, none of their inventory belonged to them. The employees took it pretty well. They'd apparently known it was coming. But it's not much different than when a long suffering, sick relative finally succumbs. It's as if a haven or destination you've come to count on has been bulldozed. You are compelled to return, but the door is boarded up. There is emptiness where there was easy meaning. The manager had freshly learned the information he was disseminating. It was clear that he was laying it out for his employees at the same time he himself tried to process it. I don't know how long these people had shared the office or each other's lives, but moments before they'd been joking about all the cocktails that start with "C" and bragging about the toys they'd given their kids for Christmas a few days ago. Now, just two days before a new year, they were being shut down. I felt like I should do something to help. But there was nothing for me to do. I simply said, "I'm terribly sorry about all of this" and departed. As I was leaving, I heard the manager telling the office staff to have all the employees come in at their usual times. One more day to say good-bye and think about what would happen next. It is an awful thing to watch the involuntary ending of any group of people. And what's sadder than dissolution of a company is the worry that in this economic landscape, some of these disenfranchised people will not find a new office to occupy.

Violet Tremors - Sci-Fine!

2011-12-27T09:27:00.000-08:00

The VIOLET TREMORS leave a place in the middle of the bed for you!

They characterize their milieu as "minimal-synth". Aesthetically, that may be true. But Lorene Simpson and Jessica White, with their ambitious songs and stylish performance, Sci-Fi fly in the face of simplicity or mathematics. The girls appear childlike in their Futurist-Victorian schoolgirl garb, but their comparisons span the grownup range of 80's middle-brow pop, the likes of Adam Ant and Lene Lovich to the art music of Laurie Anderson or sexy-messy rock chops of P.J. Harvey. At the El Rey Theater at the close of their first US tour, they opened the show for Ogre (purveying his OHGR project).

OHGR is as Ogre does.

On paper, the Violet Tremors seem an unseemly fit with the grandaddy of industrial rock. But within two songs of the Tremors' set, the audience excavated a context and welcomed the lithesome duo. In performance, the Violet Tremors forge an integral relationship to monster-man, Ogre. Just as the girls seemed infected by the conjuring trance their headliner has honed over decades, Ogre himself seemed to be having a better time than ever, playing and interacting - perhaps attributable to the infectious playfulness of the Tremors? This spirit was not lost on the audience who found footing in the uncharacteristic whimsy. But if the Tremors installed a patina of good nature on the show, it served to remind the crowd that Ogre has always been a serious artist who doesn't take himself as seriously as he may take his multiple personas.

Jessica and Lorene welcome you to the machine.

As the front gal of the Violet Tremors, Jessica White is a sultry and sexy dragon lady, dancing on a bubble of wry humor. She bleated ethereal lyrics in a voice that did its best monotone but intermittently betrayed melodic sensibility. I liken it to Chris Cornell's rock-shriek which does little to disguise that beneath his choice of style is the voice of an angel. But the Tremors' vision and voice are clearly, carefully contrived. As is the group's persona. As Jessica teases the audience with mixed messages of jaded dismissiveness and desperate pleas for attention, Lorene skirts the shadows, intent to concentrate on keyboard and effects, practically hidden under pitch-black bangs. She occasionally comes up for air to smile at an inside joke a fan may have telegraphed from the floor.

VIOLET TREMORS: TIME IS THE TRAITOR

The threat of pretty-girl pretense gives way to robo-clownery as Jessica morphs from sassy siren to funky chicken. Again, Lorene cracks up. This is what separates the potentially drab from the devilishly delightful in this rhythmic, sometimes hypnotic band. The Violet Tremors were on tour in support of their debut CD (on LP for you vinyl-heads): Time Is The Traitor. This first release is a fairly accurate representation of what the Violet Tremors sound like. But it only scratches the suggestive surface of who the girls are in performance. I'll be following this group interested to see where they plant their flower seeds and how their tremulous vibrations resonate at the core of the scene.

Tex & Daisy. What a pair...

2011-12-22T14:45:00.000-08:00

Susan Beth Stiefvater

I met Sue Stiefvater when I got my first job on the "Mainland". That job was at Sambo's Restaurant in Reseda and I was a busboy. I had just gotten off the boat from Hawaii and was trying to make my way in the big city. I didn't yet know that people who lived in "the Valley" were actually nesting there to foster their denial about living anywhere near a city. I was so naive I had my feelings hurt by an operator who hung up on me when I couldn't answer her because I didn't know what an area code was. "Do you live on an island?" Then I met Sue. My pal and co-worker Carol Carbone introduced me to her after another co-worker, Dana had introduced me to Carol...

Carol: Who is that guy?

Dana: A Mexican who speaks really good English...

Carol and I hit it off at once. Even though she was wearing a brown Polyester Swiss Miss uniform. Carol took me to meet her best friend Sue who had her face buried in a school book and would barely look up at me. I smiled, turned on the charm and used my best tap-dance to get her attention. Nothing. I made quips and did funny voices. Crickets. I was put off, insulted and left hating the little snob. I should have known I'd end up crazy in love with her.

Sue and Carol were roommates and they took pity on me when I broke up with my first LA girlfriend Jeannette. I moved in with the Sambo's girls. I was jobless, demoralized and dumb. But Carol and Sue were New Wave Valley Girls. They lifted me up, encouraged an 80's hair-do and dragged me over the crest of San Fernando to West Hollywood and The Odyssey disco. There we met all kinds of New Romantic young folks, popstars of the day (Kristy McNichol, Rick James, Billy Idol) and encountered the most alternative of lifestyles. I also threw up for the first time from drinking too much. Then there were the mythical drives up and down the winding gauntlet of Laurel Canyon, shit faced. Carol with her forehead against the steering wheel sorting double vision from curves while I held Sue by her waistband while she leaned out of the Subaru backseat window and filled the canyon with Southern Comfort.

This is as far as I'll get. A few days ago when I mentioned to Sue that I was writing a blog about her, she had a bona fide fit. She not only got angry that I might be embarrassing her, but the thought of me talking about the past dredged up some pretty big issues. It made me a little sad, but if you know Sue, you know she doesn't like the attention and HATES being misunderstood or misrepresented. Susie didn't want me to tell the story. So, this is all you get. I won't tell you about our 5 years together or what we learned or should have over that time. I guess the most important thing for you to know is that we survived each other and are still very close friends today. I call her "Little" she calls me "Big". We still fight, laugh and lend each other money. She was my first true love. I will love her forever.

Let the Halloweenification begin!

2011-09-22T12:32:00.000-07:00

I'm telling you! Halloween is chasing down X-mas with a chainsaw. It is definitely the 2nd most popular American holiday. I've never seen so many decorations and holiday novelties before in my life. Target stores alone, have a whole section dedicated to Halloween - including amazing food kits! Cookies, cupcakes and even a haunted gingerbread house!

Target hits the bulls-eye with this year's Halloween novelties!

Wish these were around when I was a kid. (only 10 bucks)!

And Disneyland has taken a turn for the best kinda worse. Mickey-o-lanterns, great window displays and lots of spooky-themed takes on rides like The Nightmare Before Christmas - Haunted Mansion. A Space-fire creature inhabits Space Mountain through the eerie month. The season's fireworks show has a good dose of classic Haunted Mansion too.

It's in the Disney-details! The whole park is tricked out for treats!

Main Street takes our favorite holiday mainstream!

If we could just get folks to start giving presents on the 31st, Santa wouldn't stand a chance! Have a happy and horrible Halloween all my monster pals. Make sure to post your favorite Halloween haunts here and EVERYWHERE so that the season continues to fester and grow!

Love, despite otherwise...

2011-06-19T02:35:00.000-07:00

Near the trailer.

Maybe 4 years old? Squatting next to a water faucet. Rinsing. The boy isn't watching what he's doing. But he is practiced in his chore. Rinsing. He turns toward the Instamatic...

Earlier. Parents balling fists. Sending electric pressure through the boy, loosening everything inside of him. He is just a baby. He doesn't understand why there is tension so sore and constant that it makes him mess himself. He's just a baby.

But he does mess and they do react. They make noise and call names that hurt like the belt. And the boy struggles to connect their words to their faces to his life - in confusion and a damp depression. He's just a baby and doesn't know why things are wrong. Only that he is wrong.

And so, this morning he does his ritual washing next to the trailer, under the spigot. The grass has grown tall and green where the water spills. Regularly. And the boy is practiced in his rinsing. Underpants.

His eyes turn toward the camera and the depth of sadness in them is concussive. The profound worry. The abstract humiliation. I look into the eyes and I choke up. Audibly. Every time.

A picture is worth a thousand apologies.

They are not mine to make, but I pray them for him. To him.

The boy grew up and I found him. Together we made a friendship that elevated us both past certain pasts. But his eyes were stained by some echo of that ancient suffering. His eyes rarely cried. But in the perpetual ripples on the shade of neglect. Under the tattoo of the memory of abandonment. In the faded hollows just under his brightness...

...audibly. Every time.

For Bee

Love Horror? Want More? Rondo Awards time again!

2011-02-24T09:46:00.000-08:00

Every year since 2003, David Colton and his Classic Horror Film Boards have presented the RONDO HATTON AWARDS! These treasured lil' statuettes are the only horror award nominated and voted on by classic horror fandom at large. This coveted acknowledgement within our community is much more friendly than competitive. Sure, we all want one. But at the end of the day, supporting the Rondos means fostering attention for the classic horror faire we love and encouraging the creation of more classic horror-related media for all of us to enjoy.

When you check out a RONDO BALLOT for the first time, I think you'll be surprised at the number of categories AND the sheer quantity of nominees listed. It's remarkable to note how many talented people are lending their energies to exploring the genre and keeping it alive through diligent, creative, well-researched work. If you are new to the genre or the Rondos, I can assure you that you won't find a more literate or well informed field. Now, I know there are a lot of categories. But be aware: YOU CAN VOTE ALL OF THE CATEGORIES - OR - JUST THE ONES THAT YOU ARE FAMILIAR WITH. But I would challenge you to get up to speed with as many nominees and their works as you can. It'll be a rewarding effort.

As in most RONDO BALLOTS past, there are a number of Forrest J Ackerman-related projects nominated for honors this year. Here they are:

10. BOOK OF THE YEAR

FORRY: The life of Forrest J Ackerman, by Debbie Painter

And...

HOUSE OF ACKERMAN, by Al Astrella and Jim Greene

11. BEST MAGAZINE OF 2010

FAMOUS MONSTERS OF FILMLAND

14. BEST MAGAZINE COVER

FAMOUS MONSTERS # 250, by Michael Heisler

You'll also enjoy voting on everything from "Best toy, model or Collectible" to "Best Blog of 2010"! At the end of the ballot you'll find a list of write-in categories which includes the prestigious "Monster Kid of the Year" Rondo. This is an honor that goes to the person the community feels put forth, "efforts beyond the call of duty to build a better world of gods and monsters." I can tell you first-hand that this nod is one of the great honors in our genre. I received it in 2009 for my care-taking of our beloved Forry Ackerman in the last years of his life. It was like a big hug of appreciation from the people most important to me. This year YOU get to decide who gets that hug!

Me and my very own Creeper!

So, amble on over to the RONDO AWARDS ballot and cast your vote. Just cut and paste the ballot into an e-mail and make all of your choices. Be sure to include your name on your ballot or risk disqualification! Send your votes to David Colton at: Taraco@aol.com no later than midnight of March 27th, 2011. Do it now! The monsters are listening!

Monster's Ink: FM and me!

2011-02-21T20:56:00.000-08:00

Our grand ol' Uncle Forry. He started it all!

Wow! I recently edited retro issue #70 of Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine. Issue #70 represents the first of the missing FM issues that appeared when Warren Publishing replaced FM with Monster World for ten issues in the 1970s. For a monster fan growing up in Hawaii, Famous Monsters, or "FM" was my only lifeline to the horror world I loved. To get the opportunity to link my name to the magazine's legacy was, well, a dream come true. Years ago my dearly departed friend and original FM editor Forry Ackerman asked me, "So pal, when you were a little boy did you ever dream you'd grow up to be best pals with me?" I'd be lying if I said yes. But once I did become Forry's best friend, it was obvious to me that we belonged together. I seemed to have a positive impact on him and he found it easy to relate to me. We were an unlikely but remarkable fit. Opposites in personality, but our value for loyalty and sense of wonder was the same. Nonetheless, if you had ever asked me if I could imagine following in the footsteps of my mentor by editing an issue of FM? I would have laughed in your face.

The 1st issue of Warren/ Ackerman's "FM" c. 1958

I got a call from FM publisher Phil Kim in September. It was then that he offered me the managing editor position on Famous Monsters #70. I was over the (full) moon. The issue was going to replicate the old-school 70's FM as closely as possible, right down to the black and white newsprint pages! I asked if I would have any control over content and was thrilled to hear that I would. I hung up with Phil and immediately began spinning my wheels. Off the top of my head I knew I wanted to do a Dick Smith-style makeup layout and to have some of the iconic elements of the old mag brought into this issue. Things like Forry and Warren's anti-smoking ads and perhaps a whole segment on fan collections of the time (I had collected so many vintage pictures). As it turned out, FM was still growing and morphing. So, two weeks after agreeing to edit the mag, I got another call from Phil. Now I would be "guest editor" under copy editor Jessie Lilly, managing editor Mark Redfield and editor in chief Mike Heisler ... Oh, well. Growing pains. But I was still excited and wholly grateful to be involved.

MY first issue of Famous Monsters magazine.

As it was to turn out, Mike Heisler and Mark Redfield left the FM organization before issue #70 had been put to bed - but not before determining the content and layout of the issue. I confess, at first I hated the Hercules In New York cover, but it had already been locked in as the face of FM #70. The artwork was nice - but the subject? I made the best of it and asked my young, talented (and sarcastic) friend Justin Halliwell to write the "Filmbook" for HINY and I really warmed up to the subject as Justin's tongue-in-cheek treatment tickled me. Today when I look at the cover art, I kinda love it. I smile knowing what fun it represents. I also asked my good pal Elizabeth Haney to contribute a retro-article on Women In Horror - as I insist on female fandom being represented in any project I am involved in. Finally, I contributed the editorial intro (with as much pun-shine as I could muster) to honor our Ackermonster and captioned much of the mag - other than August Ragone's Destroy All Monsters piece and 2 of Max Cheney's terrific multi-contributions (I did caption his YORGA piece - some of my proudest groan-worthy work). Jessie Lilly and the rest of the FM staff were incredibly diligent in putting the finishing touches on the mag. I hear the final product is fantastic! As I write this, I understand that copies of the issue have just hit the FM offices and I am really excited to get one in my claws!

The cover of issue #70. Don't judge a book...

It was a bittersweet ending to the project when I was informed that I would now be credited as senior editor. I embraced the honor, but admit I was a little sad that the mag wouldn't truly represent what I woulda/coulda done. So, while the perfect opportunity to edit a real FM was not the perfect experience (like all journeys), I'm really glad I did it! I hope it opens the door to more participation in the stuff I love. Maybe down the line I'll get the chance to create MY perfect issue? I have other exciting projects planned with FM, Phil and his dedicated crew. As FM evolves, It will certainly hit its stride. It's no small feat transitioning from an entertaining novelty of the past into a relevant presence of the future - but we're all working away at trying to get there. I am incredibly grateful for the opportunity to participate in the genre, honor Forry Ackerman, perpetuate FM and to have had such fun doing it. Buy a copy of FM issue #70. If you like it, tell Phil to let me do it again sometime! Do check it out. I'm proud of it and it was made with a lot of love of fandom, Forry and MONSTERS!

EPILOGUE: I now have copies of FM #70 in my grubby little paws. It's really fantastic! It does exactly what we'd all hoped. It looks, smells and feels like vintage FM! Phil plans to learn from this issue and continue to tweak the authenticity (he's gonna up the paper thickness a bit), but all in all it's quite a faithful replica of the original. I gotta admit, it choked me up a bit to imagine Forry examining this issue. I could see him, beaming as he turned it over in his hands and read every single word. Hope you enjoy it! Looking forward to more...

Women and Children First?

2011-02-20T09:31:00.000-08:00

[My friend, artist and activist Dame Darcy recently sent out the e-mail below. While it deals with hot-button political issues, they're important to all of us. I've removed references to party affiliation and replaced them with POLITICIAN or POLITICAL (all in caps) wherever possible so that you might judge the issues and not just react from purely party loyalties. I have left the "sources" as they stand. I hope anyone reading this will judge the info on its merits and not automatically assume a "side". I mean, can we afford to treat politics as a sporting event when human suffering and our commitment to taking care of each other and the most vulnerable in our society is at stake?] - Joe

The lovely and talented Dame Darcy

Dear Friends,

It might seem hyperbolic to say that POLITICIANS have declared a war on women.

Sadly, it's not.

Just take a look at the top 10 shocking, crazy things POLITICIANS have proposed in recent weeks. If you think this constitutes a war on women, please share this email far and wide--forward it, and post it on Facebook and Twitter.

I wish I could say these were the only examples of the POLITICAL war on women. But it's just a sampling, and more is sure to come -- unless we raise a ruckus and call them out. So please, share this email today.

Thanks,

Dame Darcy

Top 10 Shocking Attacks in the War on Women:

POLITICIANS not only want to reduce women's access to abortion care, they're actually trying to redefine rape. After a major backlash, they promised to stop. But they haven't.

A state legislator in Georgia wants to change the legal term for victims of rape, stalking, and domestic violence to "accuser." But victims of other less gendered crimes, like burglary, would remain "victims."
In South Dakota, POLITICIANS proposed a bill that could make it legal to murder a doctor who provides abortion care. (Yep, for real).
POLITICIANS want to cut nearly a billion dollars of food and other aid to low-income pregnant women, mothers, babies, and kids.
In Congress, POLITICIANS have proposed a bill that would let hospitals allow a woman to die rather than perform an abortion necessary to save her life.
Maryland POLITICIANS ended all county money for a low-income kids' preschool program. Why? No need, they said. Women should really be home with the kids, not out working.
And at the federal level, POLITICIANS want to cut that same program, Head Start, by $1 billion. That means over 200,000 kids could lose their spots in preschool.
Two-thirds of the elderly poor are women, and POLITICIANS are taking aim at them too. A spending bill would cut funding for employment services, meals, and housing for senior citizens.
Congress voted yesterday on a POLITICAL amendment to cut all federal funding from Planned Parenthood health centers, one of the most trusted providers of basic health care and family planning in our country.
And if that wasn't enough, POLITICIANS are pushing to eliminate all funds for the only federal family planning program. (For humans. But POLITICIAN Dan Burton has a bill to provide contraception for wild horses. You can't make this stuff up).
Please share this email today. Post on Facebook and Twitter.

Sources:

"Forcible Rape' Language Remains In Bill To Restrict Abortion Funding," The Huffington Post, February 9, 2011
"Extreme Abortion Coverage Ban Introduced," Center for American Progress, January 20, 2011
"Georgia State Lawmaker Seeks To Redefine Rape Victims As 'Accusers,'" The Huffington Post, February 4, 2011
"South Dakota bill would legalize killing abortion doctors," Salon, February 15, 2011
"House GOP Proposes Cuts to Scores of Sacred Cows," National Journal, February 9, 201
"New GOP Bill Would Allow Hospitals To Let Women Die Instead Of Having An Abortion," Talking Points Memo, February 4, 2011
"Republican Officials Cut Head Start Funding, Saying Women Should be Married and Home with Kids," Think Progress, February 16, 2011
"Bye Bye, Big Bird. Hello, E. Coli," The New Republic, Feburary 12, 2011
"House GOP spending cuts will devastate women, families and economy," The Hill, February 16, 2011
"House passes measure stripping Planned Parenthood funding," MSNBC, February 18,2011
"GOP Spending Plan: X-ing Out Title X Family Planning Funds," Wall Street Journal, February 9, 2011
" Birth Control for Horses, Not for Women," Blog for Choice, February 17, 2011

The RITE: It's just not...

2011-02-01T17:09:00.000-08:00

What possessed Sir Hopkins?

I love demonic possession films. The best of em' like The Exorcist. The King Kong of devilish horror movies. I even enjoy watching low-rent entries like Beyond the Door or the recent Exorcism of Emily Rose. So it was with an available soul and hand-clasped hope for terror that I went to see The Rite last night. It was boring. A terrific supporting cast with nothing to do but wax dour and severe. A lead character with the charisma of a gum wrapper. And Anthony Hopkins working as hard as he could without breaking character to laugh at the absurdity of the scenarios he found himself central to or to scratch his big head in baffled confusion over this crappy script. I'm not gonna spend a lot of time bitching about this failure. Just needed to vent because I was really eager to see this film and more than willing to forgive minor flaws in order to take the trip. I'm telling you. I should be making these damned horror movies!

Boo! Not as in scary Boo. As in thumbs down Boo!

A Most Fitting Send-Off for Verne Langdon.

2011-01-25T14:37:00.000-08:00

The late great Verne Langdon's memorial service: 01/25/2011

The cover of Verne's memorial booklet

The intimate service began with Verne's varied musical pieces played through the sound system at the little chapel at Pierce Brother's Valhalla in Burbank, CA. Calliope, piano, organ, lounge, haunting, funny. As disparate as Verne's talents. Many familiar faces filed into the pews. After a brief prayer, Dawn Langdon Karrash (Verne's ex-wife and best friend) read an amazing eulogy that touched on the many facets of Verne. It was as touching and funny as the very spirit of Verne himself.

Special people of importance in Verne's life

Verne's silver urn was displayed before a gigantic white wreath next to the dais. Dawn's daughter, Verne's niece, made a very personal and poetic speech about Verne losing his father in a commuter plane crash when he was young. She recalled some of the same premonitions the day Verne left us. Uncle Jim Warren was remembered in the honorary pallbearer's list, although he and some other's on that list were not able to attend in person.

Verne would have loved it. Tears. Laughs. Cheers.

The service was short and sweet but so very rich in legacy and emotion. Dawn did an amazing job of making all of us understand just how much Verne loved us. Once Aaron Shaw's bagpipe had sweetly blared Amazing Grace, the crowd disbursed and all were invited to give further tribute at the Magic Castle. It was great to be there with friends Casey and Rhonda Wong, Dan Roebuck and Eliot Brodsky who'd flown in from the East for the occasion.

Big or small, all of us die only once. When a special person like Verne Langdon leaves us: artist, wrestler, clown, musician, writer, magician, bon vivant, orator and friend - we get one chance to memorialize him. This modest, eloquent service was perfect. At the end of it, the audience spontaneously applauded. Unconventional for a funeral, but absolutely appropriate for Verne Langdon's funeral. He would have insisted on it!

RUBBER: I'll never TIRE of the Avant-gore!

2011-01-22T11:48:00.000-08:00

Monster-brother Feo Amante

Feo called and asked me if I wanted to go see RUBBER. Seems our dark shepherd, Maestro Amante was working a shoot, dismembering cast members in San Diego and was hoping I’d go screen this odd film in his place. Odd? Me? I’m there! I’d heard of Rubber, the movie. It was a French horror film about a telekinetic tire that kills people. You heard right. A tire, as in a tire on a car or, uh, voiture. Maybe a Firestone, or in this case a Michelin that kills people dead (fine then, morts)! So I rattled my bones into a heap of black clothing, grabbed my crispy new notepad and my favorite yellow (non-leaking) pen and drove through Friday night Hollywood traffic to the old Silent Movie Theater on Fairfax near Melrose. The show was at midnight, and I knew the theater was tiny, so I got there an hour and a half early. Jesus! There was already a line around the block. I paid ten to park near a senior rest home. I walked up the avenue and past the throngs of excited, 20-something cineastes and made my way to the box office. I quietly mumbled, “press?” Nope. I dared to push, “Does that mean that I have to…uh..?” Yep, the ticket taker pointed to the line that now stretched beyond my sight and was also growing fat as a Python swallowing a bus bench. “But will I get in if …” An adorable shrug with a detectable, “no way” attached to it. I solemnly walked to the end of that line - doubled in the time I’d spent trying to wrangle my way out of having to stand in it. By now I was doing my most impressive, audible sighing. It suddenly dawned on me that I was never going to last in the cold (OK, 57 degrees - still arctic by LA standards) for an hour and a half with the likelihood of getting as far as the ticket-taker who’d tilt her head refusing to take my ticket. I walked back to my car (pausing to seriously consider that senior rest home), let the parking guy keep five bucks from the ten I paid. Took the other five back. Then I drove straight home where I sit now typing this in my sweats with a handful of raisins and some decaf. Don’t laugh. I actually have the fireplace on…

That's right, a headshot of the killer!

So, I can’t tell you about the movie Rubber, per se. But what of the general idea of experimental or unconventional filmmaking within our genre? I don’t have to actually see Rubber to know full well that a movie about a killer tire named “Robert” is one that should be made and seen. In movies as in life, you gotta take chances in order to innovate. You have to stretch wide to reach territory that is uncharted. You gotta really dig deep for the good stuff. Not into digging? Well, look what you settle for then: a quagmire of Vampires more attractive than they are dangerous. Lazy zombies moldering the four corners of our collective conscience. Torture-porn that is as unsophisticated as it is mean-spirited. Who wouldn’t embrace a murderous rubber tire right about now? Hell, a gas cap would be a welcomed protagonist. Rubber writer/director Quentin Dupieux has made a name for himself defying the expectations of his audience. He is an established artist and musician (Mr. Oizo) in France. In his 2001 movie debut, NONFILM, an actor wakes up in the middle of a movie shoot and accidentally (?) kills the crew. The surviving cast decides to continue on without a script or camera. In Dupieux’s next offering, STEAK he tackles the well-worn high-school-clusterfunk theme. The social molasses-bath we all must wade through in those sticky teen years. Yes, Dupieux’s losers struggle to become cool “Chivers” gang members, but in Steak, we come to learn that the 2016 setting is even more futuristic than we could have imagined. Now, here comes Rubber. A movie in which an inanimate tire becomes aware of its awesome telepathic powers and goes on a rampage slaughtering people in a desert town, or so I’m told. I didn’t get in to see it, remember?! I did chat with some of the kids in line for the show and the consensus was that they didn’t know what to expect but they were itching to have their expectations defied. They were all eagerly waiting in that line aching to be surprised. I mean, just based on a vague synopsis, aren’t you hungry to see it? I am, dammit!

The Silent Movie Theater on Fairfax in Hollywood

Some of my favorite moments in horror and Sci-Fi movie history have been the ones that shook the foundations of convention. Imagine sitting in a theater in 1926 and experiencing the visionary future of Fritz Lang’s METROPOLIS for the first time. Many of Lang’s enduring images have been brought forward through homage in other classic films like BLADE RUNNER. And what about Jean Cocteau’s surreal and gorgeous LA BELLE ET LA BETE (46), which influenced lots of other, mainstream entertainments, including the design of Walt Disney’s Haunted Mansion. The stark reality of Tod Browning’s FREAKS, freaked-out audiences of 1932. The elegant, and haunting films of Kenneth Anger took us in unexpected directions as well. Andy Warhol and Paul Morrissey’s duo of FRANKENSTEIN and DRACULA served up our classic horror icons in a campy, irreverent way that challenged us while still offering graphic and disturbing imagery and ideas. John Landis’ edgy and smart AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON changed the horror game in big ways, truly advancing the modern dark comedy and offbeat horror milieu. More recently THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT created a niche in the genre. It broke down some major barriers for truly independent filmmakers, proving that anyone with a camera and a story might shoot a blockbuster. Of course I’m listing innovative movies that had a big impact on me. I’m sure you have a list of your own. Today, horror movies continue to give us some of our best opportunities to experience something totally new. THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE is one movie that’s as much about the audiences’ anticipated dread of the subject matter, as it is the delight of watching the Grand Guignol comedy play out. I avoided seeing that film for months imagining the worst. Truth be told, I laughed from beginning to end. Darren Aronofsky’s BLACK SWAN is arguably a horror movie, but undeniably a masterpiece up for an armload of Oscars at the time of this writing. The experience of being shaken up and surprised is one I search for daily. Clearly It’s no mystery to me that there is now a movie about a murderous tire and that people are lining up to see it.

Not exactly what you think it is...

It makes perfect sense to me that most genre fans are filmmakers, aspiring filmmakers or at the very least, highly sophisticated audience members. We can count ourselves among the most creative and literate members of our communities. It’s good to know that there’s room for everyone that wants to throw their hat in the ring. It’s good for all of us to passionately insist that there’s room for everyone. I’ve always thought that our job as responsible audiences or even critics is to challenge ourselves to give stuff a chance. As much stuff as possible. We don’t have to like it all, but we do have to encourage, maybe demand risk-taking and freshness from our storytellers. As a filmmaker myself (RED VELVET), I’ve always felt a responsibility to try to innovate material. Without having seen Rubber, I still know I want to support Quentin Dupieux and the very concept of the movie. After all, this is how we take turns supporting each other. Not every outing will be a gem but each attempt contributes to the betterment of the next. And that means the experience of movie magic will be sustained a little longer. As I’m writing this, Karen from Magnet Releasing, the very gracious host of the Rubber screening has texted me that she missed me at the theater and will invite me to another press screening! Maybe Feo will be free to come with me next time? I may just buy a ticket the minute I have the opportunity. I don’t think I can wait. I'll let you know when my review finally makes it up at Feoamante.com!

Verne Langdon: he could do anything but live forever...

2011-01-07T11:51:00.000-08:00

Verne barely menacing me

Verne Langdon. Gone. I called him "Cousin Verne" because he occupied that awkward age-gap that separated my heroes from my peers. Too young to be Uncle. Too much older than me to be brother. But when we were together, we spoke the same language. We talked about the things we loved. Music. Movies. Monsters. James Warren. Forry Ackerman. All the creative pursuits. When I spoke, it was about my wishes and dreams. When Verne spoke, it was about all the dreams he had accomplished and how I might accomplish some of mine. We loved to laugh together.

Verne and his coveted Zombie mask!

Verne had been a fixture in the golden age of Sci-Fi, Fantasy and Horror. Back then he had his fingers in everything us little kids read about in Famous Monsters magazine and dreamed of being a part of. He knew our heroes personally and at Don Post monster mask company he made monsters with his own hands! He was also front and center as the era morphed from the 60's into the 70's - my own coming of age. While Forry and the old-timers were walking red carpets in skinny ties and horn-rimmed glasses, there was Verne, decked out in Polyester bell-bottoms and a psychedelic silky-shirt. Long, feathered hair and all. Just the sight of him made a kid of the era feel like there was hope for us to rub elbows with our genre greats.

You can read about Verne's varied and colorful life all over the Internet. But what many of you sadly won't get a chance to know now is his incredibly nurturing nature. His kindness to his fans and his loyalty to his friends. I have heard Verne speak hypercritically about people close to him without ever losing an ounce of the love he held for them. I have seen Verne champion people who needed him most - and without any expectation of reward. He mentored a young friend of Forry's and mine, Casey Wong and allowed Casey the privilege of making his last life-cast (Verne claims the first too)! All of this integrity bundled up in a big, warm-hearted man who made you smile just by entering a room.

I am happy to have been a member of Verne's extended family. He was there in Forrest J Ackerman's last days, crying and telling our Uncle Forry how much he'd miss him. I was happy to be able to return Verne's cover paintings for his Phantom of the Organ and Vampyre of the Harpsichord LPs to him. Eliot Brodsky, the generous man behind Monsterpalooza, was instrumental in showcasing Verne at his brilliant Monsterpalooza conventions and giving attention and respect to Verne. It was at a Monsterpalooza that Verne and I exchanged our only cross words ever. It was a disagreement about a talk Jim Warren gave in which I took exception to some of the things suggested about Forry. Verne and I got into it in the hallway. Then we had lunch! That was that. That was Verne. Never shy about speaking his mind. But always able to separate his love from his ire.

James Warren, Verne Langdon and Forry Ackerman

at Forry's final ComicCon.

While I spoke to Verne on the phone more often than I saw him in person, he knew how much I loved and respected him. I always told him so. At our last lunch together at Musso & Franks in Hollywood, we teased each other. Verne harangued me for eating a veggie platter while I mooed at him for scarfing down half a cow. You'll be happy to know that Verne didn't deny himself any of the joys of living. The gist of our lunch was Verne encouraging me to submit my solo CD (MAINLAND) to the Grammy's for consideration. He brought me the paperwork and all. Not only was Verne doing me a favor in mentoring me, but also in that gesture he was letting me know that he really liked my work and thought it was worthy of consideration. It meant the world to me.

The dust is still settling on Verne's passing. All I've heard is that he had eaten lunch, complained of indigestion, laid down for a nap and never woke up. If Verne couldn't be around forever, that's the way I'd wish for him to check out. We have experienced the loss of many old-timers in the past few years. It is a sad clearing of a field that is underrated and extremely important to our culture of creative vision and invention. So many good people. Verne, like all of the best of them, seemed to go peacefully and sweetly to his rest. Take the time to meet Verne Langdon now that he's gone. He'll surprise you, just as he did in life. Good-bye old friend.

Snippit-snappet, hum...(?)

2010-10-17T20:43:00.000-07:00

My beloved niece, nephew and me. We are all just bait...

A random paragraph I found in an untitled folder. Who are these people and what became of them?

"The cabin of the small car was filled with a chilled version of sunshine as the air conditioner battled fitfully to beat back the rippling heat outside. The car seemed so small now that there were four adults filling it. Even the group's exhaustion seemed to take up space. The driver and all three passengers had felt their age this morning. A collective desire to call in sick - even though it was their day off. The night before had been a themed party that required lots of attention and babysitting. Not the normal poolside flop -n- bake catered with cheesy food on a paper-plate-mosaic with potato salad and a puzzle of chicken wings. Black olives filling the gaps. Now the group of four sat staring out the windows of the speeding car. Sour stomachs jostling. Pina Colada mix and bitter rum wanted out."

Any Dream Analysts Out There?

2010-09-03T08:27:00.000-07:00

Lee Byrns and me in Glasgow, Scotland AND reality...

I was with Lee Byrns going to a swimming pool, but the pool was at the Los Angeles airport and the airport was across the street from the beach and we were both naked. We were clowning, wrestling and laughing (as always with Lee) until I realized I didn't want to be naked in public. So, I stealthily headed back to my car to get my clothes. But I couldn't find the car. It dawned on me that since I had no clothes, I had no pockets for keys. That meant I probably left the keys in the car and it might have been stolen. I was so stressed about it. More and more people started driving by and wandering around me. I didn't know what to do so I retreated to sit, cross-legged, in a grassy corner near an old wooden shed and covered myself up as best I could.

Next a group of around 20 pink Swedish tourists of all ages (also naked) congregated around me. A tour guide started talking about the history of the shack I was sitting next to and I realized I had been in that shack before and talked to the proprietor who showed me old fashioned movie cameras and told me all about the movies that had been made there. Laurel and Hardy had filmed comedies in that shack. I got on a tour bus with the Swedes and we circled the shack talking about it. I finally exited the bus wrapped in a flowery beach towel I'd inherited on the short ride, and walked up and down the beach looking for my car.

By now I was almost sure the car had been stolen. Still I walked on. I reached the end of the beach and was faced with a huge craggy wall of sand stone, which I climbed. Parts of the mountain resembled the giant hands of the Statue of Liberty. The sun was setting and it was beautiful orange and red coming out of blue, but the surface of the mountain kept crumbling in my hands, as I got higher. I was struggling to hold on. Finally, in a voice which, at the time, I could clearly identify as Scarlet O’Hara’s from Gone With The Wind, I declared, "If I am to die here and now, then you might as well go on and take me!" But instead an eagle flew by and winked at me. I knew I'd be OK then.

Back on the ground I walked what had become a wharf at sunset. But now all the architecture was cartoons. I ran up the stairs of a lopsided three-story apartment building and fell out of the front window where I was suspended by my ankles that were tangled in a Venetian blind. A huge cartoon goon on the second floor yanked me in through his window and accused me of complaining about his cooking. He asked if I was making fun of his veal. I said it was rather tough (even though I hadn’t had any). He asked if I could do better? I said, “yeah”. I then carefully prepared a veal cutlet which goon ate gratefully as I quietly left his apartment. On the beach at night, I could still hear Lee laughing. Then my iPhone alarm woke me up with the Marimba ring tone.

I'm in there!

2010-07-26T09:29:00.000-07:00

My pals Jessika and Rich were out thrift-shopping the other day and they sent me this pic...

Forry Ackerman friend (and my best gal-pal) Jessica White posthumously introduced her guy, Rich Moreno, to the world of Forry and Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine. Rich was totally hooked! To see a grown-up man experience the same wonder and discovery as I did starting when I was 9 is just inspiring and delightful. Rich can't get enough of FM and he found this one (issue #124 with a gorgeous Ken Kelly cover) in a stack of mags for only 25 cents! This pic followed:

The ol' "You Axed For It!" section of the magazine where fans could write in to Forry requesting pics from their favorite Sci-Fi, Fantasy and Horror movies. Then I got this pic...

That's nice. A pic requested by Vampire lovers Kyle Adamczak, Mark Olds and...What? You're kidding?

JOE MOE! It's me! All of these years I've complained that I never had the nerve to send more than a few letters to Forry at FM. Many of my friends had been included as "Wanted More Readers Like" or had issues dedicated to them and such. But here Rich found me hiding under a picture of a vampire-vixen flexing her fangs! Turns out my beloved Uncle Forry knew of me even back then (I was only 16 when this issue hit the stands).

The thrill of seeing my name in FM is matched only by my excitement in knowing that my pal Rich Moreno must have read that issue #124 from cover to cover to find me. He obviously pored over it more thoroughly than I or any of my childhood friends did back in 1976!

A charming return

2010-07-25T23:51:00.000-07:00

Forry gives back (what you sent)!

Imagine Forry returning something you'd sent him with a slip like this one. Aren't you dying to know what could possibly have been "too good" for him to keep?

When Harry met Forry

2010-07-25T12:36:00.001-07:00

Harry Knowles will put the "Famous" back in Monsters!

There will never be another Forry. There is only one Harry.

When Harry Knowles was a little boy dreaming of his future, it was through those visionary goggles that many of us genre fans shared back in those innocent but impressionable times. But Harry was uniquely fortunate to be born to a dad who was already immersed in fandom. See, pop Jay was a memorabilia dealer and sophisticated "insider" to the genre already. Consequently, Harry's journey of discovery began for him a little bit ahead of yours and mine.

Just as some show-biz bios start with our hero being born to "hoofing" parents and spending their first moments in a crib, onstage under a piano - Harry was delivered, mint-in-box, onto a heap of mags, props, posters and collectibles. And like a true advocate, he's never stopped adding to that heap. This familiar love of movies and the-mavens-who-make-them has driven Harry to become ultimately successful with his industry-shaking Ain't It Cool News! website which receives infinite hits per day.

Now Harry has taken on the title of "Editor in chief of Famous Monsters of Filmland.com". Another big-bang in the legacy of our classic horror genre. Bigger and bangier than many of us old-timers can imagine at the moment. The implications for our classic horror stories gaining relevance and a real context for a younger generation of fans cannot be underestimated. You see, Harry Knowles is not just "a" presence in the most modern of mediums like the Internet. He is "the" principle presence.

I could talk all day about why I love Harry or the fact that I believe Forrest J Ackerman would have been thrilled at Harry's involvement in FM (Harry was one of a few individuals Forry asked to speak to at the end of his life). When it comes to Forry, I continue to honor his wishes. As a card carrying atheist from the age of 14, Forry said many times, "Pal, when I die I won't even be aware that I ever lived to collect a single thing or to edit Famous Monsters." So, I don't intend to keep Forry "the man" alive after his well-earned rest. But I will never let the flame of his spirit of inspiration blink out.

The sad reality is, there can never be another Forrest J Ackerman. The happy reality is that Harry Knowles is a completely unique individual who doesn't have to try to be Forry. By simply being Harry he's been able to inspire creativity in our community. By being Harry he has helped ensure that the genre we love still rules the entertainment media. He has fixed it so that we genre fans have an inordinate amount of power over the content of the mainstream, pop-cultural bandwagon. Today, one of my proudest accomplishments, other than standing by Forry's side to the end, has been introducing FM publisher Phil Kim and Harry.

So, get ready fellow fans. There's a new monster-champion in town. One who comes from us old-time classic horror fans but is made up of the fresh new vanguard as well. Thanks to Harry, we may never have to experience a lack of Sci-Fi, Fantasy or Horror material in our lifetimes!

Please support Harry Knowles, Phil Kim, magazine editor Michael Heisler, Jessie, Dominie, Mark, the whole hard working staff - and ME - a contributer and self-appointed ambassador and cheerleader for the new Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine! Help make this the best monster mag ever - then watch what happens!

Why we are BIG on Spam!

2010-06-27T12:18:00.000-07:00

SPAM: Breakfast of champions. Gigantic, high-blood pressured, heart diseased champions!

Mac nuts meet Spam! Why? (but don't you wanna taste em')?

Growing up in Hawaii, Spam was as common as bacon. I believe Hawaii is the largest consumer of Spam in the US. The Spam Festival is held in Waikiki annually. Spam is eaten at breakfast with eggs. Lunch, on rice in Musubi. Dinner, more rice and even gravy! It is an acquired taste, but as is the case with many childhood foods, it is a comforting reminder of where we come from (and Monty Python). But it should also be a warning of where may be headed if we eat too much of it!

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size: (100 grams)

Amount Per Serving

Calories: 310

% Daily Value*

Total Fat 27g

41%

Saturated Fat 10g

49%

Cholesterol 70mg

23%

Sodium 1369mg

57%

Total Carboydrates 3g

Dietary Fiber 0g

Sugars 0g

Protein 13g

26%

Vitamin A	0%		Vitamin C	1%
Iron	5%		Calcium	1%

*Percent Daily Values are based on a 2000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calorie needs

Random Images from an unmarked box...

2010-06-12T22:30:00.000-07:00

I stuck in my thumb and pulled out some plums and said what the..?

These pics of Lionel Barrymore and Marlon Brando were in an envelope back to back. I put the two names into Google and got the following results: You can buy Lionel Barrymore's last will and testament for $10 and Marlon Brando's for $20 at Celebrity Collectibles.

Somebody gave me this invitation to Divine's memorial service. I wish I could find the list of items she (Glen Milstead) consumed the night of his death. I think it was published in the LAweekly at the time. I know there were multiple chickens involved.

Francis Ford Coppola's Dracula's Gary Oldman's Werewolf's foam rubber genitals. Left in a Macy's bag on the front stoop of the Glendower Ackermuseum. Is there anymore to be said? We laughed until the latex deteriorated.

Neither Snow nor Rain nor Pumpkin Head!

2010-06-11T22:35:00.000-07:00

My favorite postage stamp.

Mystery From the Ack's Museum!

2010-06-10T17:59:00.000-07:00

You have puzzled to the likes of Marcel Duchamp!

"With Hidden Noise" (A bruit secret), 1916. A ball of twine between two brass plates, joined by four screws. An unknown object has been placed in the ball of twine by one of Duchamp's friends.

---

Thrilled to the mysterious stone faces of Easter Island!

The large stone statues, or moai, for which Easter Island is world-famous, were carved from 1100-1680 CE (rectified radio-carbon dates). A total of 887 monolithic stone statues have been inventoried on the island and in museum collections so far.

---

Now prepare yourself for the latest in modern mysteries!

Two sealed letters written by Forrest J Ackerman in 1956, to be delivered in the event of his untimely demise! What on Earth could be inside?

A last will and testament?
A message to a favorite waitress?
The words "Sci-Fi"?
A lock of hair for Mother?
A final fantastic short story?

We may never know! Why, not even Joe Moe Know! But it's fun to speculate, ain't it? Please do speculate below...

Mr. Sci-Fi & The Pimp

2010-06-06T17:47:00.000-07:00

What an interesting neighborhood! Iceberg Slim is interred a mere 9 cubicles away from Uncle Forry Ackerman! Wonder what they talk about?

Iceberg Slim (Aug. 4th, 1918 – April 28th, 1992) also known as Robert Maupin Beck, was an African-American author of books variously categorized as urban fiction, street literature, and black pulp fiction. He wrote Pimp and Trick Baby among his eight novels.

Forrest J Ackerman (Nov. 24th, 1916 – Dec. 4th, 2008) was one of the world's greatest Sci-Fi fans. He shared his collection of books, art and props for decades in his Ackemuseum of Sci-Fi, Fantsy and Horror. He also inspired countless young horror fans (50's thru 80's) through the pages of his iconic Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine.

Maestro Dario Argento carries us with him.

2010-05-29T13:41:00.000-07:00

The iconic Italian Master of Horror, Dario Argento with his personal copy of my slasher-movie: RED VELVET, seen at the Los Angeles Weekend Of Horrors. Having intended the movie to be partly homage to the great man, it's been so gratifying to hear that he likes it!

Maestro Argento lugs our baby around...

Hope you'll have a look at RED VELVET. It's quite an accomplishment. There are actually some dumb folks bad-mouthing the movie for purely personal reasons and we need to counter their petty negativity with legitimate reviews of the movie based on its merits! Smart people unite! Don't let the dullards win! Thanks!!

Rondo comes home to Horrorwood and Forry!

2010-05-22T18:41:00.001-07:00

A special "Thank You" to Horror-hero David Colton for administering the Classic Horror Film Board and for taking time out of his already ridiculous schedule to present the Rondo Hatton Awards to acknowledge outstanding achievements in the world of classic horror.

Forry would be proud...

This year's Rondo Award for "Best Fan Event" was handed out to ME for organizing the Forrest J Ackerman Tribute at the Egyptian Theater. Boundless thanks to all those who contributed to the success of the event; Tim Sullivan, Dan Madigan, Kevin Burns, Sue Stiefvater, Mat Sampson, Margo Gerber, Marc Doten, Denny Moynihan, Heather Lockie, Barry and all the speakers and attendees! It was a great send-off for our favorite Uncle.

New relics from The Haunted Mansion

2010-05-22T17:23:00.000-07:00

I don't know of any horror fan that doesn't have a special love affair with Walt Disney's Haunted Mansion. As a kid, that magical attraction (calling it a "ride" would be sacrilege) was the landmark of my dreams. Growing up, I felt that place was made just for me. So, naturally when I visit I MUST take a piece of it home with me. And Disney has made it easier for us to do just that by manufacturing an ever-changing flood of reasonably priced, gorgeous - but painfully limited editions.

Haunted Mansion 40th anniversary ear hat (by SHAG) with lenticular ears and groovy sateen hat box. Retail around $40

Coffee Mug (cool wallpaper imprint inside). Retail $12

A couple of T-shirts - gray one (early ad) already sold out. Retail $24 ea.

The most recent, elegant ear hat with bat stanchion. Retail around $15

Most of these items are already out of print. Of course, they can be had on eBay at up to triple their retail price. Yuck! Best thing to do is visit the park soon and pick up a few souvenirs. The Haunted Manison is the last attraction I ride before the park closes. I hang back and examine every detail I can. The skull sconces. The carpet. The gratings above the doors. Then I hop in the very last Doom Buggy possible and wind my way through the place. As I round the corner into the graveyard, I make a silent wish that the ride will break down in front of the singing busts so that I can watch and listen to my hero Thurl Ravenscroft sing the entire Grim Grinning Ghosts song...Happy haunting!

Debbie Painter on Womandom in Horror Fandom!!

2010-05-20T20:03:00.000-07:00

I recently spoke to Debbie Painter about women in horror. She’s a writer, historian and close, long-time Forrest J Ackerman friend (mine too). Her much anticipated Forry-bio is about to be released! She’s also an equestrian and a dinosaur expert! Horses and Dinosaurs? She must love Valley of the Gwangi! Anyway, we’re gonna have a casual chat about women in genre fandom through the ages.

Debbie Painter

JOE MOE: Debbie, you’ve been a fan for a while now...

DEBBIE PAINTER: 30 years…

JM: 30 years, she says with a mischievous grin. So, since the 60s and 70s. During the peak reemergence of classic Universal horror and the slay-day of Hammer British horror - ramping up to modern day slashers, huh? Uncle Forry has said that back in the ghoul-den age of horror, "female fans were as rare as Pterodactyl Pteeth".

DP: Back then I thought there were plenty of female fans. There was always an abundance of female fan letters in genre publications. Primarily Sci-Fi, but horror as well. I never dreamed that in the year 2010 female fans would be regarded as rare?

JM: Did you attend many fan events back in the day? What was the population of female fans at those early Cons?

DP: Actually, the first Cons I went to were Sci-Fi oriented. I didn’t start going to specifically “monster cons” until the 90’s. There were definitely more women in Sci-Fi but I would estimate nearly 30% females at classic horror oriented conventions I attended.

JM: What are some of the specific contributions you feel women have made to the horror genre over the years?

DP: Generally, I think women tend to be more involved in the artistic creation of art and costumes. Jewelry. Architecture of film. Set designers. And there’s no shortage of female actors in classic horror - and modern horror as well.

JM: Can you name some influential women in the genre?

Some Horror-fying ladies: Donna Lucas, Jovanka Vuckovic, Ann Rice, Pam Keesey & Jessie Lilly

DP: Let’s see? Obviously authors like Ann Rice who stoked and evolved Vampire lore. We also have spitfire Jovanka Vuckovic (former editor of Rue Morgue magazine) who always makes a space for classic horror. Jessie Lilley who was publisher of Richard Valley’s seminal genre mag Scarlet Street and then publisher of Worldly Remains mag before assuming the editor's chair at Mondo Cult mag. Jessie is now moving on to editorship of Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine. And let’s not forget Pamela Keesey who wrote Women Who Run With the Werewolves and Vamps. Those are some accomplished contributors. Just the tip of my particular iceberg.

JM: Would you say the oft perceived “boys club” in the horror community has been more receptive to women fans as time has gone by?

DP: I’m probably gonna get myself in trouble…

JM: Do it!

DP: Well…(way too long pause)

JM: That’s a no! (Debbie laughs raucously) So, tell me why?

Penny Dreadful

DP: I think it’s true, Joe. I don’t think many male fans think of female fans as much more than attractive loiterers. If you’re pretty, like horror host Penny Dreadful for instance, you’re in! If you’re not, well…

JM: Hi, Penny! A talented horror host, filmmaker and writer. Love her!

DP: She is terrific! Generally speaking, there seems to be a lot of ignoring of women fans. There’ve been female writers forever. For example, Pamela Caron and Deborah Felan wrote for many genre magazines. I found their writing to be equal to the best of the boys. I don’t know why their work hasn’t been given as much attention as it deserves?

JM: In your opinion, what entities in our community have the best track record for honoring the talents of female fans?

DP: Book publishers are becoming more and more receptive. Producers are opening up to women filmmakers too. Midnight Marquee Press told me that I was the first woman who had ever written for their book series when I wrote “Hollywood’s Top Dogs – The Dog Hero in Film.” That was in 2008.

Debbie Painter's Doggie book!

JM: A lot of husband and wife teams putting out quality product. Gary and Sue Svelha put out the Midnight Marquee imprint, right?

DP: That’s right.

JM: Tim and Donna Lucas publish the highly respected Video Watchdog mag. Jim and Marian Clatterbaugh produce Monsters From The Vault mag.

DP: I heartily endorse all their efforts.

JM: They are the best of our community. So, wrap it up for us, Monster-sis!

DP: I don’t want to sound like I’m sucking on sour grapes. I just hope that the day is coming when male fans will look upon us female classic horror fans as equal contributers and not just as someone who resembles the Mom who threw out their Famous Monsters of Filmland mags when they were ten years old!

JM: Ha! Testify!

Debbie smacks Ack!

[Deborah Painter has written articles for such magazines as Filmfax and Horse and Horseman. She is currently an environmental services director for REMSA Incorporated. Debbie's McFarlane-published biography: "Forry: The Life of Forrest J Ackerman" is due out on October 31st or November 1st, 2010 - with a "Forryword" by ME! Please support this wonderful woman of horror!]

More than half way home...

2010-05-08T23:32:00.000-07:00

It just happens. You wake up one morning and you have to confront how you're gonna deal with the news. You probably have less years ahead of you than you have behind you. All of the things you thought you wanted have morphed into things you actually need and the few dreams you've maintained may not have come true yet - and probably won't on your timetable.

But thanks to the presence of the friends you've earned over time, you won't have to suffer. Those friends will come together, celebrate your life and remind you of what good you've made. Sure, they'll lavish banana and chocolate cake on you and give you nice presents. But mostly, they'll reveal your soul's footprint on their lives and happiness.

As I approach this new version of this life of mine, I don't have any desire to collapse or feel disappointed. Happily, I have surrounded myself with such high-quality people and more than my fair share of love. Those who call me "friend" really get me. And I get them. I have a terrific relationship with my entire Mo'e family and extended family.

I hope time marks you in the same generous way I have enjoyed. With a well-founded optimism, energy to spare, good health and an army of gentle soldiers who make me proud to call them my people. Onward!

Old age comes to Mr. Moe

Two Tors. Johnson & Johnson.

2010-05-06T01:14:00.000-07:00

Aritist Gray Morrow's concept and ultimate

Monster World #5 cover.

Utopia = a mythical smile. Bye, sweet Bic...

2010-05-03T13:02:00.000-07:00

The one and only Bic

In a taxi from the Bangkok International airport. The petrochemical perfume of the darkness was smeared by the slash of factory lights. Elevated freeways studded with too many traffic cops in surgical masks, dark glasses and helmets. An army of peanut butter bowling pins. Down an off-ramp, joined by a swarm of motorbikes with leaf-blower engines crowding around the minty, air-freshened cab like pilot fish jockeying for a stray morsel. Finally, the highway roar turned to a low buzz as my cab angled down a quiet side street.

John Goss was waiting for me on the curb in front of his Utopia gift shop, pub and guest house. John, best friend since high school in Hawaii. Utopia. A giant pair of Calvin Klein underwear in the window. Six feet wide by four feet tall. Too big even for me! Utopia was an oasis cobbled out of ambitious hospitality. From the outside, it seemed a goofy-seductive beacon on a dingy street. The shop gave a whimsical pulse to the atmosphere around it. Through the window I saw the man-treats: racks of novelty greeting cards made of abs, prismatic lube-bottles displayed like jewelry, obscure and mysterious objects scattered throughout - and lots of artwork featuring tan and glisten. Orchid and ass. Temple and bulge.

Entering the shop, John had my suitcase, which left me free to flail about as if I’d stumbled into a musical theater meadow that demanded that I flail. It is a natural instinct for a person to wave their arms around in nature. Flailing in nature feels perfectly normal. But I’m in a shop in Thailand. Still, it feels normal. You just have to tuck your arms in when you get going, so you don't give the magazine kiosk a whack on the way around.

Then I saw “him.” When John saw me see him he ushered me out of the store and into the adjacent coffee shop. My neck tested its limits as I strained to see “him” forever. John looked at me through a facade of tolerance. “Joe, don’t fall for Bic…everyone falls in love with Bic. He…blah…blah-be-dy…blah-blah…” I couldn’t hear anymore. I only spoke Thai and the only Thai I spoke was the word “Bic.” From behind his counter in the retail shop, Bic yanked my soul out the top of my head with his teeth. He returned it all smudgy and with his tattoo all over it. That very first smile - custom made for me. And by someone who must know me so well. If right then I had collapsed from an aneurism, the life that flashed before my eyes would be: I enter the shop, flail, then Bic. Enter the shop, flail, then Bic. Enter the shop, flail, then...

John cautioned me again, this time enunciating and with gestures, “Everyone falls in love with Bic. Everyone…beware…beware…beware...

Old gigantic me couldn’t hear it at first. But I let it settle in. I trusted John with my life and John knew how fumbly I could be with my heart. So, I set about ignoring Bic and exploring the city called Bangkok. Cocktail bars where phantoms massage your shoulders, whispering a pipe dream in exchange for a handful of American paper. Cabaret shows where beautiful men float on a sea of feathers and stilettos like swans breaching the moss brûlée on a cool pond. Shops of endless blue rope. Temples made of broken dishes and gold leafed deities. Sidewalk carts roasting custardy sweets on dimpled grills. The smell of fish guts, candy, incense, blood, flowers, motor oil.

But at the end of the day, I came back to Utopia and to Bic. Whether he was behind his cashier’s counter or D.J.ing in the pub upstairs, Bic was the last person I saw before climbing the last flight of stairs to my room. He was the last image I weighed as I closed my eyes to dream. Then he returned in my dreams. What happened next is happy, but not as important as all that lead up to it and came after it. A memory of Bic's love and a cab ride that brought me to it. The "at first sight" moment we say we believe in but have never tapped or tasted. I am so grateful that Bic was mine for a time. Grateful that he chose me to love. His image is tangled up in a trunk full of memories that might be trivial by themselves, but taken together ward off any specter of loneliness. Blue rope, feathers and holding my breath in the sunlight of the famous smile of my Bic.

Mookie and Bic

[The want. We spend most of our lives chasing a solution to the doubt that occupies the space of that want. On the rare, if any, occasion we "get", it doesn't last forever. But it's the mere shadow of that success that lets us hang on in the knowledge that love can happen if we never relent in looking for it. Bic is that proof for me; That someone too good for me could become a partner in fulfillment. Today, on the eve of my birthday, my friend Mookie wrote to tell me that Bic had died of Malaria. He died on his own birthday; April 22nd, 2010. I will miss him forever. Starting...now.]

May Day is "Lei Day" in Hawaii!

2010-04-30T15:16:00.000-07:00

A rainbow of leis waiting for your neck

If you make it to O'ahu, Hawaii on May 1st, you'll experience one of the most beloved island traditions. May Day is "Lei Day" in Hawaii. The very first Lei Day was held on May 1st, 1928, and practically every person in Honolulu observed the day by wearing all styles of handmade and store bought lei. In 1929, Lei Day was made an official holiday which continues to this day.

A May Day lei-making contest is held in Waikiki

Festivities are still held downtown and in Waikiki with hula, music, lei making demonstrations, exhibits and lei contests. At Kapiolani Park you can see the lei contest entries hung up in an outdoor viewing gallery which people from all over the world flock to see. Old-school leis and innovative ones made from seeds and other unconventional materials are featured there.

Kamehameha Statue draped in Hawaiian lei

At Iolani Palace (the only monarchical palace in the USA) the statue of King Kamehameha is draped in traditional green Maile' leaf wreathes and over-long, colorful flower garlands. The balmy climate seems to carry the perfume of Tuberose, Pikake and Plumeria into every corner of the Island. It reminds me of a thousand special occasions from weddings to birthdays to funerals I observed growing up in Hawaii.

My dad - the late, great Josefa Mo'e

May 1st is also my Father's birthday. He would have been 75 this year. My dad's name was Josefa Moe and he was a true Hawaii local and beach boy. Quite a celebrity around town. Dad was a graphic artist. He was also a knife dancer. The kind you see spinning sharp and often flaming blades at a luau. Dad was at the top of his field though the 50's, 60's and 70's performing worldwide and at the International Market Place and the Royal Hawaiian Hotel.

Learning to swim with my dad in Waikiki

When I think of Lei Day and all the festivities that come with it, I always remember dad's birthday and that beach at Waikiki where dad taught all of his kids to swim. That's also where his 11 children scattered his ashes just a day or two before Don Ho joined him. Aloha, dad.

MAY DAY IS LEI DAY IN HAWAII

© Lyrics & Music: Leonard Hawk

May Day is Lei Day in Hawaii

Garlands of flowers everywhere

All of the colors in the rainbow

Maidens with blossoms in their hair

Flowers that mean we should be happy
Throwing aside a load of care
Oh, May Day is Lei Day in Hawaii
May Day is happy days out there

Uncle 4e making a Monster kid beam.

2010-04-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

Famous Flame-wars of Forryland!

2010-04-29T11:33:00.000-07:00

[The following is an article from the 1974 vanity publication "AMAZING FORRIES" that was updated in 2003 to include more recent material. It was intended for a contemporary reissue of Amazing Forries, but sadly was never published. So, here, for the first time, Forry gripes to you from the great beyond! Enjoy, my Monster cousins.]

Love Letters From My Fan Club

by Forrest J Ackerman

“Ackerman, you are a basketcase of acrimony!” – famous prozine editor (via air mail special delivery) upon the occasion of completely misinterpreting my motive in calling to his attention an obscurely published criticism of his periodical. “As for Ackerman’s ebullition, I fear he can hardly be taken seriously in matters involving the criticism of imaginative literature." He once wrote me a letter with a very childish attack on my work – "he evidently enjoys verbal pyrotechnics for their own sake and seems so callous to imaginative impressions.” – An Elder God of the weird canon.

“What does this Ackerman guy know about weird and fantastic fiction? From the way he writes, he must be an unimaginative person unable to stretch his mind away from spaceships and foreign star clusters.” – Fan of the early 30s.

“Ackerman’s Folly” – Referring to the first issue of FAMOUS MONSTERS OF FILMLAND. The individual with the critical opinion was a fan 18 years ago, is now a pro.

“You are the greatest catastrophe that ever happened to Science fiction!” – Fan turned book publisher in the 50’s who objected to me as an agent “bugging” him once a year for overdue royalty payments for my clients he had published.

“Ackerman, shut up! – And get those damn Monster fans of yours out of here!” – Author to me at a World Convention when a group of horror film aficionados had clustered around at the back of a hall and were eagerly asking me questions.

Cyril Kornbluth author and thuggish welcome wagon!

“So you’re the Ackerman who writes those ridiculous letters to the magazines!” Followed by a punch in the stomach. This was my welcome to Fun City in 1939 when I was met at the other end of the train line by some New York fans of the day, including the 15-year old Cyril Cornbluth who was to die prematurely but not before making a serious mark in the sf world as an author of pessimistic power. I always thought of him as the Sci-Fi world’s Oscar Levant.

“Peculiarly ridiculous” – An author who loved the craft, Ackerman must be daft or an imbecile or a notoriety-seeking clown and knave” - Member of the Lovecraft Circle describing me at 18. At least he gave me the benefit of an or rather that drubbing me into the ground with “ands”.
“Since you take 10% of my money, I feel you owe me 10% of your time.”- Disenchanted art client. In other words, no agent could have more than 10 clients.
“Ackerman is young”- yes, I was, once, especially at 18 – “as proved by his tendency to regard ordinary civilized language as alien and incomprehensible.” Who would have believed that this egregious stripling would have burgeoned into the terror of the English tongue, the Ackermangler of the King’s lingo, the creator of telescopiancontractions, telepathicommunications, neologisms & novacious coinages, portmanteau words, the scourge of the Anglo-academicians, the promulgator of the dictum that “The Pun is Mightier than the Sword”, the presentime purveyor of monsteriffic bone mots from his lair in Horrorwood/Hollyweird Karloffornia, a compleat collector of Lovecraftales and the auctorial representative of Clark Ashton Smith in the penumbral days of his life!
Anonymous voice on the phone: “Ackerman, you’re a son-of-a-bitch and you’re going to die for what you did to Glenn Strange.” Glenn Strange was the actor, now deceased, who took over the role of the Frankenstein monster after Karloff, Lugosi & Chaney Jr. had played it. What I did to him was give him a big publicity break in the pages of FAMOUS MONSTERS and supply him with a number of free fotos, lobby cards & posters of himself in roles he had played. But the story persists to this day that I stole stills from Glenn Strange.

Glenn Strange as Frankenstein's Monster
“Do you know why Ackerman took that 8700 mile trip all over the country visiting monster fans? Where do you think he got all those great stills for the “Bride of Frankenstein” issue of FAMOUS MONSTERS?” Well, I sure as fate didn’t steal them from every kid in the country (or even the kids in the city) because the issue in question appeared several months before I took the trip! Time travel???
“Ackerman is a crooked agent.” – Editor of about a quarter a century ago who was convinced I was selling stories to Mexico and telling my clients the Mexican editor wasn’t paying. He was – his translators one-thirteenth of a cent a word. At my own expense and with the authorization of such authors as van Vogt, Evans, Beaumont, Bradbury, etc., I was implementing a Hands Across the Border Seminal Scientifiction Program. But the author (a prominent one) “bought” the editor’s story that venal Forry was a crooked agent.
“Why did you hang onto my Hugo Award for a year and then, when I found out you had it, and asked for it, delay another month in delivering it to me?” (In case the anonymous author ever sees this and takes exception to this quote as not being verbatim, he may be correct, but I do not have the letter handy as I type these words – which are burned into my brain – but I think that it’s safe to say that the quotation is substantially correct.) I was being accused – but bitterly-of accepting an author’s Hugo in absentia, not informing him of it, keeping it for a year before he learned I had it, and then delaying several weeks in delivering it thru the mail after he had requested it. Well, it never happened, but it cost me approximately a hundred bucks & a lot of unpleasant emotion to prove my innocence. In the first place, I couldn’t have picked up his Hugo because embarrassingly, they weren’t physically present that year to be handed out – so I was reminded by long-distance phone call to London to the man who had been head of the World Convention that year. Secondly (but who needs a second with a first like that?) Franklin Dietz, who’s been taping the Cons since the time Alley Oop gave up chipping the reports on tablets of stone;- Franklin Dietz eventually played off the tape as the awards were announced and…naturally, there was no “California drawl” (the way my voice was described by an Anglofan after I visited London in 1951) saying, “I am honored to accept this Hugo on behalf of -.”
All the pretty Hugo Awards
“I won’t rest until I see Ackerman in jail where he belongs- with John W. Campbell!” How Campbell got into the act or how I got so lucky, I’ll never know. Pronunciamento of a “litigational paranoid,” who died in an asylum in Germany, after dragging me before the Board of Equalization or something.
IRS: “You only reported $1000 income from the Greenleaf Publishing Co. [IMAGINATION] but they say they sent you $10,000!” “Well, of course! Don’t you understand? I’m an agent! I only keep a commission…and pass most of the money on to the authors!” “Oh! Say, this is an interesting collection you have here - mind if I look at it?” IRS agent later, just before leaving: “By the way, I believe we owe you $32.” Thank you – come back anytime!

You have some nerve, printing First Class on this package of 4^th class trash you’ve sent me.”- Magazine editor of the 50's to me as agent.

“Ackerman, I’m mad at you. I’ve read my eyeballs out on this million words of junk you’ve sent me and there isn’t a word worth buying.” – Editor who had 3 or 4 titles going at the time. One man’s trash was another man’s treasure as I eventually sold a good deal of the material to other editors.

“I’m stony broke in the big glass jungle. You got any money for me?” I didn’t have, but for this client who I figured had such a big potential (and he did) I dug into my own pocket and aired him enough money to buy himself another week of time in New York. Seeing editors, I thought; seeking assignments. Instead, with my stake, he was shopping around for another agent. After he got one, he justified dropping me by writing a cantankerous, vituperous, excoriating 5-page letter (and those were the nice things he had to say about me) outlining all the things that were wrong with me as an agent. (Don’t you wonder sometime what I’m doing right to still be in business 30 years later and representing close to 150 names? Are you sure you’d like to read my autobiography – if I ever write it? And name names?
“Forrest Ackerman stole the METROPOLIS Robotrix!” I always believed the original, film-femmebot was blown to bits in the great Blitz of Berlin during WW2. It only recently came to my attention that I had actually watched (over 100 viewings at the time of this writing) my beloved “False Maria” burn up on screen in the climax of Fritz Lang’s Sci-Fi masterpiece. Fact is, I commissioned Bill Malone and crew to spend hundreds of hours to recreate her for me. I even designed the (never seen on-screen) back panel of the Robotrix myself!
Ultima Futura Automaton and Rotwang in METROPOLIS!

“Forrest Ackerman is destroying Lon Chaney’s makeup kit!” One of the saddest days in my life came when an LA museum reclaimed the Lon Chaney makeup kit I had proudly displayed to thousands of fans for years. And all due to poor wording (not mine this time!) of an ad for a product I merely endorsed. A fan who had refurbished the kit for preservation, decided that rather than waste the makeup dust cleaned from the kit, he would manufacture a tribute Chaney ring with a speck of the residue makeup included. The ad read: “Own an actual piece of Lon Chaney’s makeup kit.” Fans were alarmed at the thought that I might be chopping the historic kit of the Man of 1000 faces into a mess of a million pieces! As a result of the controversy, the museum decided to reclaim the kit to languish in the obscurity of a cold dark vault.
A handmade poster (in very familiar handwriting) was nailed to my front door upon my return from my recent horrible hospital habitation: “Hurry up and die Forry Ackerman! You’ve been cursed.” Well, I’m still here, which leads us to the burning question; Would you buy a used curse from this fan? Say, I could arrange for an annual death-curse. I might live forever! At any rate, this terrible cruelty didn’t inspire Anger in me. Just pity for the person who delivered it.

“Ackerman, you’re a basket case of acrimony!” (Just wanted to make sure you’re awake and paying attention. We’ve come full circle. End of gripe session and on to more pleasant topics. -FJA

Break Into Song at ANMT!

2010-04-17T11:01:00.001-07:00

ANMT; The Academy For New Musical Theater, is a North Hollywood institution that is paving the way for fresh new musical theater projects. Through development deals and workshops, ANMT partners with book writers, lyricists, composers and theatrical venues and organizations to produce these new musicals.

ANMT's roots go back 40 years to the original theater workshops of Lehman Engel, the preeminent Broadway musical director. The remarkably knowledgeable and passionate John Sparks has been the sole Artistic Director for two decades. Executive Director Scott Guy expanded the historic writer's workshop to include actors repertory company and a professional wing to develop musicals directly for producers and theaters. In 2003 Elise Dewsberry was brought on as resident dramaturg and Associate Artistic Director.

John Sparks, Scott Guy & Elise Dewsberry

I came to ANMT a few years ago with my dear friend, fellow musician and co-writer Brian Woodbury. We were collaborating on a stage musical called KILLA VANILLA! I sat in on the developmental workshops and was completely smitten by the program. It was there I met brilliant ANMT dramaturg Elise Dewsberry, who I am proud today to call a mentor and friend. It was the experience of auditing that workshop that inspired me to formally join ANMT and go through their core curriculum.

There are few forms that are as collaborative as musical theater. There are also few disciplines that are more rigidly structured. As a screenwriter, I have seen my understanding of my own work grow immensely! If you have the time and the reasonable amount of money to attend these workshops, I can't recommend them enough. Especially if you're a professional writer who is already in a groove. These workshops will kick your ass in the best possible way.

You can come see the results of these workshops when this year's core curriculum class presents their 15-minute Musicals at the Colony Theater (Burbank) in June!

One word: Monsterpalooza! One suggestion: Get there!

2010-04-10T00:21:00.000-07:00

The undeniable genius of artist Mike Hill

MONSTERPALOOZA opened with a shriek on Friday, April 9th. Horrorwood's finest craftspeople and artists came out en masse to show the best of their best makeup FX work in Burbank, California. Sculpture rules at Monsterpalooza. Not just likenesses and cool creatures. Actually, some of the most highly artful, soulful figures you'll ever see. Fantasy characters and familiar icons of the genre brought to still-life. Many so hyper-realistic you just stand staring, waiting for them to breathe.

My pal Kevin Kirkpatrick; a Supermodel with his super models!

Maestro Guillermo Del Toro came down from the heavens to walk among the fans and buy up all kinds of goodies. He stopped and chatted with Casey Wong (19-year-old makeup artist and Forry Ackerman's protege') I saw old friends Brinke Stevens, Don Glut, Ron Chaney, Bela Lugosi Jr., Eric Caiden, Frank Dietz and many more who were guests of the show - and just as mesmerized by the quality of work as any of the fans in attendance.

More Mike Hill masterpieces to covet.

Brilliant sculptor Mike Hill outdid himself this year with an absolutely spot-on Elsa Lanchester as the Bride. If that wasn't enough he crafted a monochromatic duo of Lon Chaney Jr. as Lawrence Talbot and a second figure of Chaney as the Wolfman. Any monster fan who doesn't get goosebumps rubbing elbows with these life-sized monsters is an ice cube. My pal (and key makeup artist on my movie RED VELVET) Kevin Kirkpatrick superbly nailed a trio of beloved oddities from Tod Browning's FREAKS! Shlitzie, Prince Randian and Johnny Eck.

You have got to come stand near these and HUNDREDS of other incredible pieces at MONSTERPALOOZA. There's a Forry display in the museum. And come attend my Forry panel on Sunday, April 12th too!

Rondo Award: He wins! We win! 4e does it again!!

2010-04-06T02:25:00.000-07:00

Ack at rest in his silver spaceship. Gone but never forgotten

The Forrest J Ackerman Tribute won the prestigious Rondo Award for "Best Fan Event" last night!

"(the) all-star tribute to the late Forrest J Ackerman, organized by his friend and caregiver Joe Moe in March 2009 at Grauman's Egyptian Theater, was voted Best Fan Event. In a statement, Joe Moe said the tribute marked "the fulfillment of my final promise to Forry, to hold a tribute so we could all come together to laugh, cry, celebrate and say goodbye. Forrest J Ackerman shall never die!"

Don Post lifemask and 4E award

You can read about ALL the winners and runners up here: 8th annual Rondo Award Winners!

All sincere thanks possible to all of you who voted for us. Contrary to what some might suppose, I don't believe it's important to remember Forry for sentimental reasons. Nope. I think it's INCREDIBLY important to remember Forry because of the magic his spirit continues to do. Every time someone asks "who was he" or Googles his name, we stand a chance of sparking one more talent. We stand a chance of stoking one more storyteller. Where there's Forry, there's imagination. And where there's imagination, there's endless possibility!

FORREST J ACKERMAN SHALL NOT DIE!

RONDO Polls have closed! Results Tonight!

2010-04-04T12:25:00.001-07:00

Thanks to everyone who voted THE FORREST J ACKERMAN TRIBUTE as BEST FAN EVENT on the RONDO AWARDS ballot. An extra-Gigantor thank you to dear David Colton who administers the entire Rondo effort, as well as counting the nearly 3000 votes - a new record! David is a prominent figure in his field and our genre and his generosity and dedication to our cause is incredibly Forry-like!

RONDO Monster Kid Hall of Fame & Comeback of the Year 2002!

This Rondo nomination was particularly important. It seems the more distance we get from Forry's passing, the fewer opportunities there may be to keep his name in the public eye. In my heart of hearts, I truly believe that the Forry Tribute just HAD to be the best event of the year! Not only because it was a once-in-a-lifetime happening, but it personified the best parts of our classic horror genre community and the very spirit the Rondo Awards seek to acknowledge and promote.

Proud Monster Kid of 2008 - ME!

I apologize to those of you who voted early and then had to endure my constant haranguing about getting your ballots in. The thing is, even though Forry is a beloved figure and the Forry-event was legitimately deserving of the award, there were MANY events in our category and some of our competition might have been more well-attended (our Egyptian Theater only seats 600). I couldn't risk sacrificing the opportunity for a potential Forry-Rondo to complacency. I hope my pushiness paid off?

The RONDO AWARDS will be announced tonight! To observe the awards ceremony LIVE, join the CLASSIC HORROR FILM BOARD and then attend the "BLIND HERMIT'S NEW HUT" chat room (6th forum from the top)! Best of luck to all the very deserving nominees. I hope we did enough to bring a posthumous Rondo home to Horrorwood for Uncle Forry!

It's up to you. RONDO or no? Help keep our beloved Uncle Forry in the Punshine!

2010-03-27T13:13:00.000-07:00

Voting for the RONDO AWARDS ends tonight, April 3rd, at midnight! Please follow the instructions below and do your part to help insure that FORREST J ACKERMAN SHALL NOT DIE!

You do NOT have to vote the entire ballot. Just the categories you are familiar with or care to vote for. If you just wanted to vote for The Forry Tribute, here's how:

---

Write an e-mail to Rondo administrator David Colton at: taraco@aol.com
In the e-mail field, write: Best Fan Event - Tribute to Forrest J Ackerman
Include your name!
Hit "SEND" - You're done!

---

If you'd like to vote the entire ballot, you can find it here: RONDO BALLOT And here's the link to the DreadCentral Tribute article if you'd like to revisit the 4e event: FORRY TRIBUTE

Other Forry-friendly candidates: Steve Vertlieb's 4e article, The Drunken Severed Head blog, DreadCentral.com, lots of Rue Morgue, and you can also write in Forry pal and foremost woman of Horror - for Monster Kid of the Year: Jovanka Vuckovic and Best Indie Production: RED VELVET - featuring Forry's final cameo.

Thanks for helping to keep Uncle Forry in the genre spotlight. Even if you don't vote for our tribue, please consider voting. It's fun! The Rondo Awards help to keep our genre undead!

Hawaiian-Wear(wolves)!

2010-03-26T11:56:00.000-07:00

Me and my pal, FJA in very happy times and very LOUD Aloha shirts.

Magical Places Where Monsters are Born!

2010-03-24T23:56:00.000-07:00

Here are a couple of rare stills from a negative strip I found in a box of old Forry Ackerman papers. They were labeled "Universal Studios Makeup Dept." These images represent the very type that got me most excited whenever they were featured in the pages of Famous Monsters of Filmland Magazine. Even today, pics like these inspire me to look deep into the frame to discover any clue to the magic that went on in the studio. I posted them here for you to explore and enjoy. Make sure to click on the images to enlarge them. Then you can pore over every detail, just as I have!

The luckiest Monster Kid in the world

I dreamt of being the man in the picture above, didn't you? Alone in the mad lab where all the creatures of my dreams were brought to life. If I were the man in that picture, I would sit there forever at my station and just work and imagine. And when my eyes got tired, I'd get up and run around the place like a loon, taking in all the familiar objects and mysterious scraps alike. I'd learn all I could. I would invite my friends to take a tour of the place. I would tell them, "Watch your step! Mind your head! Exercise your eyeballs! Oh, and TOUCH EVERYTHING!"

One man's junk, another man's treasure

The heap above looks like a landfill to most. But you and I know that it is composed of the precious relics of our obsession. Among the crumbling stacks of plaster molds and rubber flashing, some of our favorite monsters emerge. The Gillman from the Black Lagoon! A Mole Person! Bleached lifemasks of iconic faces and unknown players, side by side. These pieces of filmmonster history, cast-off. Never meant to survive past their use in the movies we love. Lucky for us, Forry and people like him just had to get their hands on this stuff and turn it into memorabilia.

A skylight reveals secrets in clay

Somebody was inadvertently looking out for us, even before we existed. If we'd been there ourselves, we would have definitely climbed up on a shelf or counter to get a picture of the sunny alcove above. The mother lode! Wow! Is that an early Gillman design? Do I see a Metaluna Mutant maquette or two. A T-Rex? From what movie? And whose faces are hanging on the wall? Is one Katherine Hepburn? If you recognize any of the objects of places in these pics, please post and share your thoughts with the rest of us. What was your first monster makeup? Hmmmm?

Fig.1

2010-03-21T22:24:00.000-07:00

"Seul Sur Son Étoile"

by Becaud & Vidalin

...then Vikki Carr got hold of it...

(English lyric by Mark David)

"It Must Be Him"

My Grandma and I used to marvel at

the crocodile tears that would run down

Vikki's cheeks as she belted out that song on

every variety show the 60's could dish out.

Sci-Fi High (school)

2010-03-19T00:33:00.000-07:00

I wonder what the James Abernathys and John Addlemans on this yearbook page thought of their young classmate, our future mentor - Forrest Ackerman? Did Forry preach the virtues of Sci-Fi, Fantasy and Horror to his peers? Did he ever get busted for sneaking peaks at an Amazing Stories magazine during class? Was his notebook scribbled with cartoons of spacemen and monsters? Forry has said that in high school he was, "the resident crazy!"

(click pic to enlarge)

The "sense of wonder" evident in Forry's 18-year-old eyes, sparkled right up until his final moments. It's great to see his face here among his classmates. I wonder if any of Forry's contemporaries ever found themselves buying (or destroying) copies of Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine their kids brought home. Forrest J Ackerman shall not die!

Over My Head in Hollywood

2010-03-17T09:40:00.001-07:00

Fresh off the boat from Hawaii In 1982. Special FX dreams swirling, I walked into the red brick offices of Don Post Studios on Lankershim Blvd in North Hollywood and begged to do something - I dunno? Anything! I had learned of Don Post, the man, years ago in the pages of Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine. I'd fallen in love with his deluxe, "over-the-head" classic monster-masks from the striking photos in the Captain Company catalog in the back of the mag.

My Don Post mask: Schizoid

As a teen I corresponded with Don Post and was a huge fan. By the time I made it to Hollywood, Don Sr. had passed away. But on that exciting day I visited the studio, Don Post Jr. actually remembered my gushing fan letters to his father and took pity on me. I didn't have so much as a portfolio or snapshot of any work to speak of. Yet, within an hour of my first visit, Don Jr. had loaded me up with a plaster armature/mask-form, modeling clay and a handful of sculpting tools to get me started. He also gave me a guide-sheet to follow to his specifications. He said, "go to it, kid." I felt like this was the biggest break in the world for me.

1983 Don Post Catalog featuring MY mask!

(courtesy the Halloween Mask Assoc.)

I worked diligently in the kitchen of my apartment in Northridge, California. After a couple of weeks, I dared to bring the sculpt into the studio. It was a mask of a humanoid creature with an underdeveloped twin growing out of its head. Don Post was not only receptive, he was downright encouraging. He called a meeting of his staff and they did an on-the-spot critique of the piece. They educated me about doing more to sculpt wrinkles that would contribute to the "stretch factor" of the mask, making it easier to pull over a head. They told me to tone down my detail as too many lines would cause the plaster mold to develop razor sharp grooves that might cut a worker's hand.

Bottom - center on a shelf of painting-masters at DP Studios

Don then offered to take over my sculpt or to give me another chance to implement his notes, which of course, I did. In a couple more weeks, I turned in the finished piece and it went into production! My original name for the mask was "Johnson & Johnson," but Don thought we might get into trouble using that familiar corporate brand name. So, "Schizoid" it was! Having my mask join the Don Post family was a highlight of my young life. Viewing it in the company CATALOG was just crazy! I saw it in stores and at Disneyland too! Don gave me 5 copies of the mask to give to my family and friends. One went to my high school art teacher Jean Noguchi, one to my Mom, one to Dad and one to my best monster-pal Sean. Naturally, one went to Forry and his Ackermuseum where it lived happily among fellow monsters until the big old place was shut down and we moved to the mini-mansion.

Schizoid - proud to be at home at Forry's Ackermuseum

The entire Don Post Studios family was so generous and nurturing at a time when I felt myself a stranger in a strange land. Contributing professionally to the Post legacy that had inspired me as a kid was an incredible confidence builder for this island boy. Today, when I see Don Post Jr. I feel such gratitude. When I shake his hand and tell him my story, he looks at me a little funny. I recognize that look. It's the reaction of a person who is so used to doing kind turns that it's almost embarrassing to be singled out for doing a kind turn. But truthfully, Don's kindness allowed me to conquer one of my life's dreams. Thanks to him, I can say that I fulfilled my fantasy of designing and sculpting a Don Post, deluxe, over-the-head mask!

My fist born goes the way of all rubber...

Universal Monster Army: Onward Genre Soldiers! Marching as to Horror!

2010-03-15T10:56:00.000-07:00

A campaign of Shock & Awe(someness)!

The Universal Monster Army is a fan-boy or girl's best friend. Unlike the olden times when young people ran away from home to join the Foreign Legion to "forget", here you'll want to run toward the UMA, enlist and become a Creature of the Dark Platoon - to remember! To remember all of your favorite horror movies, toys and memorabilia in the company of people who know everything there is to know about the subject.

As is the case with the best people in our genre community, these men and women channel their energies into perpetuating the things they love by sharing collected art, props, photos and treasured objects of their obsession. Their research and handling of material is world-class, all leading to the creation of museum-quality displays and projects for the rest of us to enjoy. And I have enjoyed their displays immensely! A highlight of any Convention or event I have the pleasure of attending.

A UMA Forry-display and my brilliant pals who done did it.

Forry lived to see some of the early UMA displays and was mesmerized. After our very first viewing of one of their monster-toy displays at Ron Adam's MONSTER BASH, Forry remarked that he'd wished these folks could have preserved and displayed his own collection. I reminded Forry that, before his taking up the mantle (maybe creating) the art of "collecting", nobody held a value for these throw-away objects and ephemera. He nodded his head and agreed that he felt somehow responsible for setting the UMA on its path. The baton has been passed!

All of my fellow fans and friends should seek out the UMA. Go enjoy one of their displays, visit and participate in their BLOG, buy a T-shirt. Support them any way you can. They play a great hand in inspiring new recruits with the same "sense of wonder" that started us on our journey through a world of movie-magic and monsters. These people are true friends of the genre we love and passionate fans and champions of the memory of our common mentor Forry Ackerman. They're also incredibly kind-hearted and fun folks to be around. Let's all get together at WONDERFEST - Louisville, KY - in May!

And vote for them anywhere they appear on your RONDO AWARDS BALLOT! I wish they could collectively be awarded Monster Kid of the Century!!

Hands down, my favorite of the two...

2010-03-14T19:15:00.000-07:00

So long, kid. What a trip, huh?

Jovanka Vuckovic: A hook-up with Rondo?

2010-03-13T00:22:00.000-08:00

Or: Why Jovanka should be Monster Kid of the Year!

Jovanka and Ann "War of the Worlds" Robinson at the Forry Tribute

I hear February was Women In Horror Month. So, naturally, my contribution to the cause is to write this love letter about my pal Jovanka Vuckovic - in March! Why a month after WIHM? Because every month should be WIHM, that's why. And there is no more horrible woman than Jovanka. Her stewardship of RUE MORGUE magazine during her tenure, not only elevated that mag to prominence, but she always, ALWAYS made room for a classic horror presence. Today, Jovanka's moved on to other glorious mischief, but Rue Morgue (under new editorship of Dave Alexander, hi Dave!) continues traditions she nurtured and remains a balanced voice in our genre; attempting to give the young uns' what they expect, while tossing us old folks a bone and indoctrinating those snot-nosed squids into a world of horror, pre-1980's (or even 40's, schweetie).

Jovanka also keeps the torch burning for our most favored Uncle; Forrest J Ackerman. Forry was quite fond of her and the whole RM staff. Jovanka and her crew's presence at the Forry Tribute was incredibly warm and comforting. It was on that sad day that Jovanka coined the term "Monster Grandkids" to acknowledge a brand new generation of monster lovers AND, again, to remind us geezers to eat our fiber and to embrace the new ranks of horror-youth - cre-e-e-eak, squish! (Make sure to also vote for a Rondo for the Forry Tribute: "#17. Best Fan Event"). Look, I don't need to tell anyone how dear the classics are to Jovanka. She's a map of love and commitment to the genre, with most of our icons (Chaney, Karloff, Lanchester, etc.) as badges of Scour-age permanently tattooed all over her loveliness!

Forry used to say that female fans were as rare as "Pterodactyl Pteeth!" Well, Forry may have lamented the scarcity of femme fans, but he also encouraged many a fair lady to tryst with the dark(ish) side. Principle among them, Jovanka, Marion Zimmer Bradley, Katherine Moore, Pam Keesey, Heidi Saha, Terri Pinckard, Lucy Chase Williams, Ann Hardin, Bjo Trimble, Jessika White, Candy Clark, Meechie Simpson, Debbie Painter, Brinke Stevens, Trina Robbins, Edith Eyde, Naomi Magaziner, Jennifer Brooks, Tigrina and on and on. And Jovanka is not only basking in the radioactive glow of our genre, she's manufacturing more fans as we speak! Not by merely contributing quality works of creepy depth. She's actually got a Monster Kid on board! She's gonna have a lil' one! Now, don't get all steamy just because this is proof that Jovanka's had sex at least once! Really think of it! What better way to perpetuate the genre? Monster-momma's gonna be a monster's momma! Yeah!

The flash-vote was cast the day Rondo voting began. Now ghoul-er heads are prevailing, taking their time, approaching their RONDO AWARDS BALLOT with serious scrutiny. Now's the time to remember our Jovanka! She's a modern gal creating a healthy future for our continuing legacy of quality art and entertainment. As a young horror maven, she represents our best hope for a flourishing world of Broads and Monsters! I dedicate the rare pic below of an early "vampire" and foremother of the German stage - to my pal and a rightful Monster Kid of the Year: Jovanka Vuckovic!

Frau Wilhelm Herzog aka. Erna von Hart aka. Erna Morena

(1885 - 1962)

"Fraulein Erna von Hart is known throughout Germany as a breaker of male hearts. She portrays "vampire" roles on the stage and that she gets her characters across the footlights is evidenced by the fact that she has received thousands of proposals of marriage from love sick swains. Fortunately for her and perhaps unfortunately for her suiters the lady already has a lord and master (Eeew, the olden days - Joe), in the person of Wilhelm Herzog, the German revolutionary journalist."

Al-o-o-o-o-ha! Back at my little grass shack.

2010-03-12T23:56:00.000-08:00

Dad, my little brother Danny and me! c. 1966?

Weird, huh? Proof I was born a bona fide island boy. That handsome brown man is my Father, Josefa Moe who was a well-known Hawaiian entertainer and artist. He did the spectacular Samoan knife dance on that stage I'm sitting on (International Marketplace: Waikiki, Hawaii) and many others throughout our childhood. Yeah. He was the guy who spun those long knives like razor sharp batons, sometimes on fire! Dad was multi-talented. Aside from performing, he painted the sign you see in the picture AND carved the tiki behind us. Don't quote me, but I honestly think he may have had a hand in weaving the coconut hats Danny and I are wearing. My Dad - May 1st, 1933 - Nov. 3rd, 2006... You would have loved him.

Dad doing his thing in a 60's promo shot.

Terri-cloth In The Ack's Museum!

2010-03-10T19:09:00.001-08:00

The Old Man and the Me!

More puzzling than the shrunken Terri-cloth bathrobe are the two wristwatches! Until now! I ran across this pic of me and Forrest J Ackerman c. 1999. It was during this period that Forry (briefly) wore two watches. One was to tell time and the other was an alarm that would roust him from his frequent naps to catch a favorite TV show or pop in a VHS movie he wanted to see.

[Note: Ha! I just recalled that in the above pic, I wasn't asking the time. I was actually trying to turn off the watch alarm - the sound of a crowing rooster.]

It's odd how many memories a seemingly mundane photo can hold. From my glasses frames (my first pair) I could tell the era. From Forry's bathrobe, I remember that this was a time when he was growing older and snoozed a lot more often. The two watches came as a result of pal Lee Harris beginning to regularly supply Forry with a stack of old VHS movies that Forry wanted to wake up and revisit. That it's so dark and I'm dressed so T-shirty reminds me that I was living at the Ackermanison at that time. And my sitting on the carpet meant that there was likely a pile of paintings and props on the floor that I was still in the midst of organizing for Forry, trying to get the Ackermuseum back to its former luster.

Back then, Forry was healthy and independent so my job was simply to manage his day-to-day affairs and to try and maintain a great quality of life for him. And I did this while working a full-time restaurant job too! But the byproduct of my 4e-work was a world of incredible discovery and privilege for me! Laughing with Forry and planning our exploits was a daily gift. Forry was wildly appreciated by the genre fans and well enough to enjoy that recognition. This was a happy time for our Ackermonster and an incredible adventure for this Monster Kid.

I miss the ol' man like mad.

The Shrunken Revered Head (of Rondo)!

2010-03-08T21:49:00.001-08:00

Cheney's wicked blog is up for a RONDO AWARD!

Max Cheney is an adored figure in our genre. He's smart, kind, generous and funny as hell to be around. All of these qualities are hardwired to his acclaimed blog: THE DRUNKEN SEVERED HEAD.

Now three years old and still drunken, Max's blog is a virtual Horror-town-square of info and entertainment. Genre news, anecdotes, inside scoops, unique pics of events and even cocktail recipes are standard entries at this kitchen-sink blog. Max even featured lil' ol' ME in a Forry-memoir last Halloween!

If the excellence of this blog wasn't enough to warrant a trophy, Max has been so supportive of fandom in general and many of us personally. He is also a bona fide Forry fan and nephew! Don't take my word for it. Just visit Max's blog and you'll be convinced. I hope you'll consider giving Max your well-deserved vote for:

15. BEST HORROR BLOG - The Drunken Severed Head (Max Cheney's Unique blog about it all)

Vote here: RONDO AWARD BALLOT. Max and I will be at WonderFest in Louisville, Kentucky this May, 15th-16th 2010. The Rondo Awards are presented at that incredible Con. I'm a guest this year! Do yourself a favor and come out and play with your monster cousins!

Meanwhile, here's a nice chat I had with Max about his life, Blogoraphical stuff and the importance of the Rondos:

Horror heavyweights Tim Lucas, Max Cheney and David Schow

Joe Moe: Hey, Max! Aside from being a Monster-magnet, what was your inspiration for starting your blog?

Max Cheney: I discovered I could telepathically control my cat to type faster on the keyboard than I could peck out messages with my nose. This was before I got a used prototype android body originally built for the head of Walt Disney. (They got rid of it cheap because it had a rather bulgy fuel container around the midsection and a tendency to jitterbug at random.) Also, I had long been in love with the online community of classic horror film fans-- I met my wife there! I wanted to increase my presence and get to know more folks.

JM: I should have known it would have something to do with cats and Disney. How has your blog evolved since that very first post? Has it lived up to or exceeded your expectations?

Max: It's longer than it used to be. And I'm not sure it's lived up to ANYONE's expectations! But, okay, seriously: It's lasted longer than I thought it would, and I've been floored that it has been nominated in the Rondo Awards each year and done decently well in the voting each time. It has led me to discover some kind and interesting people from all walks of life. They're found in my links, in the interviews I've done, and the comments I get. I'm grateful.

JM: The popularity of your blog has helped to make you a beloved figure in genre fandom. Well, that and your loveliness as a human being. How has that affected you?

Max: ME? A beloved figure? You musta been smokin' somethin' POWERFUL when you thought up these questions! [Note: Kids, we don't condone the use of whatever I was smoking when I thought up these questions - Joe] Though I do have a photo of Video Watchdog editor Tim Lucas and and author David J. Schow making goo-eyes at me! But you're a nice guy to say that, Joe, and getting to know interesting fellow horror enthusiasts like yourself HAS affected me greatly. I'm more aware how lucky I am to know so many warm, smart people who share this interest in the weird, the wacky, the macabre and the monstrous. And I'm immensely pleased that the film blog; Cool Ass Cinema complimented TDSH by describing it as being like Famous Monsters magazine for adults. I never really expected any of this.

JM: Adults? Never heard of em'. Y'know, receiving the Rondo for "Monster Kid" last year was an honor I'll treasure forever. What would winning the Rondo Award mean to you?

Max: An end to years of therapy. And that the voting is rigged. Okay, really, it would mean I'd no longer have to lower my eyes in the presence of such past winners as Jovanka Vuckovic, except to pass my gaze over her attractive figure. Okay, really truly it would mean encouragement. A visual reminder to strive to be more creative with my blog and in my future writing goals.

JM: Ha! Straight, gay, animal, vegetable, teamster, blob - no matter. EVERYBODY loves Monster-Sis Jovanka (maybe this year's Monster Kid! Nudge-nudge). Assuming that "blog-master" isn't the end-all to your ambitions in the genre, what are some of your dreams for the future?

Max: I have in mind producing a CD that will interest classic horror fans and an article for one of the major genre magazines. Hopefully both will appear this year. Also, after testing the waters with my short, improvised mostly-in-a-few-days film The Drunken Severed Head Show, I'm planning on working on something more elaborate and thoughtful. And to have time in my old age to read more Shakespeare.

JM: Ah, Shakespeare! The man who wrote King Lear! I dunno if King Lear ever wrote back...(thanks Uncle 4e) So, where do you think blogs (including yours) are headed in the future?

Max: That's an excellent question. Blogs have increasingly become more like websites than the personal online journals they started out as. And they've multiplied like the rats in Willard! (Or maybe the rabbits in Night of the Lepus.) I think they are increasingly going to become blogs with multiple contributors, and ads may appear on more and more as the rules for internet access becomes increasingly influenced by large commercial interests. As for my blog, it will experiment in the year to come with narrow-focused theme weeks or months where I can get more detailed on some subjects that fascinate me, and include more interviews and more posts on genre artists. But the same love of odd news, cheap humor, beautiful women and enthusiasm about Boris Karloff, Frankenstein's Monster and Forry Ackerman will continue.

JM: And so, dear pal, say it with me!

Max & JM: Forrest J Ackerman Shall Not Die!

JM: See you in Louisville at WonderFest, Max. Here's hoping we both get a little head there (a Rondo statue, that is).

[Max Cheney is a Monster Kid originally from the hills of north Arkansas, who now lives in Pittsburgh with his wife Jane, who he married on Halloween in 2005. He's been a teacher, an actor, a plainclothes security guard, a caricature artist and a flunky at a funeral home. Now he's an online head in a pan, who enjoys being one of the moderators of the Universal Monster Army boards!]

A nod to Red Velvet from Argento himself!

2010-03-08T09:57:00.000-08:00

Henry Thomas and the Red Velvet Maniac!

"I enjoy with red velvet is a good work also for you producer. I hope a day to meet you all best - dario argento"

Dario Argento, undisputed Maestro of Italian horror, likes my movie RED VELVET! So much so that he sent a personal e-mail (quoted above) to my dear friend and RV producer Sean Fernald, saying so! This was an incredible validation for our creative team, as we'd hoped to pay homage to the master in our visual design of the movie. SUSPIRIA was a very big influence on our lighting design and color palette, not to mention some of the surreal elements we went for.

Not that our cake needs more frosting, but if we were to indulge, the icing on the cake is that the gracious Argento biographer and film reviewer Maitland McDonagh is also in our corner. You can read her comments and columns here at: MISS FLICKCHICK! If you haven't seen our movie, what are you waiting for? We made it just for YOU! Order your DVD or BluRay copy here: RED VELVET.

Also join our Red Velvet FaceBook page to keep updated on the comings and gore-ings of the film.

[Joe Moe served as co-writer, co-producer and a production designer with John Goss on Red Velvet]

2010 carries Horror-Heavy Oscars Show!

2010-03-07T22:58:00.000-08:00

This year's Oscars show credited the Horror genre as the most popular in the industry, honored Roger Corman at the Governor's Ball and featured a montage-tribute to horror movies. So, a red-letter night for our genre and industry! Flashing back on all the fresh faces that first emerged to be slashed and splattered across the silver screen was a real eye-opener. To be reminded that many A-list stars began their auspicious careers in horror projects was a terrific thing to see.

Sad to say there was no obit in the farewell reel for veteran actor (and iconic Count Yorga) Robert Quarry. Bob was much more than just a horror icon. He was a talented stage actor, gourmet chef and Bon vivant. He was also a razor sharp, bellowing wit and a best friend of his contemporary, Katherine Hepburn. He had such a big, undeniable voice in life. It was odd that the Academy would leave him silent, overlooking him in their good-byes. He was a friend of mine and I hoped he'd be remembered. Well, I'll never forget him.

Perhaps the most real-life-horrifying point in the show for me was when producer Elinor Burkett pulled a Kanye West, rushing the stage and bushwacking her director Roger Ross Williams in the midst of his acceptance speech for Best Documentary Short. When I realized - a) what she was doing and b) that I couldn't understand what the f#*k she was talking about, I put my fingers in my ears, squinted and recited the alphabet until friends assured me she was through. I was just mortified. How anyone could interrupt a person's once in a lifetime triumph is just awe inspiring. Well, congrats on winning for MUSIC BY PRUDENCE, Mr. Williams! That's YOUR statue. I hope Ms. Burkett is thrown out of every party in Hollywood. She should be forced to sit alone in her sparkly purple trash bag and eat stale pie at Ships Coffee Shop until she learns her lesson.

[Note: There's interesting inside info about this flap here: MTV MUSIC Apparently Burkett was removed as producer from the project nearly a year ago - sheesh! She's even worse than I'd imagined]

Congrats to Katheryn Bigelow - Best Director! I was pulling for her all the way. Also a big YAY to Barney Burman, Mindy Hall and Joel Harlow for Best Makeup. And a special hats-off to THE COVE, A documentary so profoundly disturbing that I still haven't been able to bring myself to watch it. But, being familiar with the subject matter and hearing of how viewing it affected people I respect, I am confident it deserved its Oscar. So who in our family will get one next year?

Famous Monsters Collaboration

2010-03-06T09:03:00.000-08:00

FM#25: Forry's Concept. Warren's finished product.

An oddly familiar WONDERLAND - that you've never seen before...

2010-03-05T18:17:00.000-08:00

I went to see Tim Burton's ALICE IN WONDERLAND today. I've had a problem with Burton's projects for nearly a decade now. I was in love with him from PEE WEE'S BIG ADVENTURE and EDWARD SCISSORHANDS but slowly lost my faith in him so much so that I actually resented his slaughter of classics like PLANET OF THE APES. I wouldn't judge any artist for choosing style over substance, but to makeover beloved, sophisticated stories with deluxe jumbo crayons, to the point of making them into slaw, seemed like a waste to me. Worse, I felt like I wasn't being allowed to get into the stories.

Well, the maestro is back and better than ever! This ALICE has such heart, wit and visual whimsy it's going to be hard for anyone to deny it. While the performances are caricatures, they are imbued with such consistency and charm, you'll feel like you know these strange people. The production design is deep. There are Easter eggs and details that you'll be picking out from now right through the Blu-ray release. Johnny Depp is pure, mad love. And this endorsement comes from a person who loves the idea of the man but has never found his performances very convincing. Here Depp gets hold of your heart and doesn't let it go. Helena Bonham Carter belongs in this movie whether she happens to be Mrs. Burton or not. She achieves that delightful loved-to-be-hated quality we cheer for in our screen villains. It's great to see Crispin Glover again in a role that lets him stretch (literally). Anne Hathaway is really funny in a part that could have been not much fun at all. She's Billie Burke crossbred with Fay Wray. And finally, the breathtaking Mia Wasikowska is an Alice that every little girl will want to be, every little boy will want to love and every adult will want to parent.

The movie is truly an original treatment, but maintains a referential affection for the many iconic versions of the story that preceded it. The book, the Disney animated movie and even more obscure imaginings all are serviced here. This incredible balancing act between the familiar and the unique enhances the mystical quality of the movie. You actually feel like you're in a dream populated by people you feel you know but in a world where you can't possibly have been before. I went with my pals Ogre and Ashley and all of us were just tickled and exhilarated by the experience.

For the first time in recent memory, I'll be buying tickets to this movie again. I hope you let it wash over you some afternoon. Surrender to it for a little while. You'll leave the theater reminded of why you love movies and Tim Burton.

Right to Life after Death

2010-03-04T16:13:00.000-08:00

“Is she supposed to smell like that, Daddy?” Rebecca put her face close to the Plexiglass. Paul lurched reflexively but only caught a handful of pink hair extensions. Just enough to prevent the 13-year-old from making cheek-to-plastic contact. Rebecca recoiled harshly, like a dog reaching the end of its choke-chain, "Ow, Dad! That really hurt!"

Paul shrugged, “Honey, if you can smell Grandma, she can smell you.”

On cue, Grandma rushed the little girl, slamming into the clear wall of the box. A tooth broke off from the force and clung to the surface like a morsel of sticky rice crispy treat. Rebecca watched the tooth slide down the Plexi leaving a trail of tobacco colored juice. A thick liquid stream of the brown fluid made its way from Grandma’s over-painted red lips to cast a gooey web across her paisley, Easter-bunny nightgown. Rebecca watched the whole oozing tableau.

“Eeeew! Dad! That is so wrong!” she hollered.

Paul mustered all the disappointment he could fit on his face, “Rebecca! So wrong? So wrong! That’s so my mother - your Grandma! Have some godammned respect!”

Rebecca was having none of Paul’s indigantion. “Respect? Did you not see her try to eat my face like a dog eats its dead master?”

Paul took Rebecca by the shoulders, “Honey, she’s not all there, is she?" And then dealt the guilt card, "I hope there’s somebody who’ll be around to understand your quirks and odd-ball behavior when you’re...her age."

“Dad, when I’m grandma’s age I intend to be ashes. If you stuff me and force me to hang in this house (that I hate), I swear I’ll get free and eat your face!” Hands on her tiny hips.

“We don’t eat family, Rebecca. Your grandmother has…"

“She’s a zombie, Dad! Noticed?”

“Do not call her that, young lady! She’s your grandma! Thankfully preserved by "Extended Family" so that we can continue to be together. Where is all of this hostility coming from? Do I need to ground you?”

Rebecca snorted, "What-ever! I’m going to my room. The smell of rotting flesh is less obvious there."

“You do that.” Paul lost the rest of his patience. "And don't come back down without an apology for me and your grandma, you brat!"

“Oh, good one Dad. And, by the way, if I ever try to eat your face, you have my permission to smash my brains out.”

Paul waited a few beats until the expected door slam, “Oh, if only.”

I love Gruff-Gruff Ogilvie-White

2010-03-03T00:10:00.000-08:00

A special portrait by Joe Moe

Barefoot to the Peak

2010-03-02T23:33:00.000-08:00

I am kneeling down before a shadowy Buddha. I am in a temple, so I assume there is a Buddha at the other end of it. So dark and cool in the deepest part of shade. Vapor of ancient wood planks seep up to me through amber, knee-polished shellac.

Minutes before, the temple was closed. But children on rollerblades circled me in a frenetic cluster of broken hellos and, "where you from?". They buzzed me with smiles then quickly disappeared like a hand full of seeds thrown into tall grass. Then, a tentacle of poppy-colored robe lilts around a corner on a breeze, preceding a gentle man. Butterscotch skin, stark against the orange fabric. Not really butterscotch. More the color of where milk meets tea. I look at the dots where a shaved hairline or eyebrow might have once been. He stands, haloed by the black silhouette of the alleged Buddha. Light at the end of a tunnel smile, he unlocks the double-door chain that falls to the sidewalk with a pleasant, haphazard melody. A clatter made profound by place and moment.

Every wisp of scent and sensation reminds me I am in Thailand. I am here for business, or as a tourist or, most likely, because I am in love. And I’d thought love had been disappointed out of me long ago. The monk bids me to observe the obscured teakwood deity. He seems so sure it's there. Squinting, I can't see anything but darkness. But the monk gently insists that I wait. I hunker down hurting my knees, unaccustomed to bearing my weight on them. The monk disappears for a moment then returns with a jelly glass of cloudy water. I take it gratefully and pretend to drink. I am a little nervous now. What is it I'm waiting for? What's in the darkness?

The answer arrives in the form of an ancient electrician. He shuffles barefoot and dragging a toolbelt that looks like a greasy shop-rag. But within seconds he throws a switch and the entire temple lights up like a carnival. There is the Buddah! Right there! That and a hundred strands of primary-colored Christmas lights. Gold leafed relics throw light into my head. The monk is giving me a knowing look that reads, "yep, happens every time". The look is similar to the one my mother gives me when she's trying to impress me with a DVD of Yanni performing live at the Acropolis. But I might as well be all alone. Here, in this temple. I am at one with this confusing sideshow. I am in heaven with this Buddah, on this day, in this country. I can no longer feel my knees. I could sit here sipping this boggy water forever.